FALLON FROM GRACE, AS IT WERE

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It seems that this time, even his young minder friend couldn’t get him out of the mess.

With a reputation for getting seriously drunk and making an ass of himself, he probably wasn’t the best candidate for defence secretary. Of course, it’s not like he had access to the firing codes for nukes or anything (an arguably even more incompetent man had them), but it was a responsible job.

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OK, I apologise in advance. I just couldn’t resist it.

He certainly made some embarrassing statements in his time. He seemed to have a talent for getting it wrong. And tact wasn’t one of his qualities when he’d had a few.

And he had a talent for making statements which showed how completely out of touch he was with any kind of reality.

So after Maybot’s spokesman was unwilling to express the prime minister’s confidence in him, despite him having owned up to touching up Mrs Hartley Brewer, he appears to have “fallon” on his sword and limped off into the sunset to spend more time with his wine cellar, in the hopes that no one will now bother finding out what else he was up to.

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Resigning seems to be one of the main duties of a defence secretary… eh Liam?

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To happier things…

Munguin’s Republic Halloween staff party took place today:

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A good time, it is said, was had by all. (Tris was in the kitchen!) Suffice to say that Munguin will have a sore head tomorrow!

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Rule Britannia, Britannia waves (or waives) the rules

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I noticed a story on Twitter this morning about the idea of commissioning a royal yacht, and, initially, I discarded it as something dredged up for a year or so ago when Liam Fox was banging on about him and Kate Middleton sailing around the world drumming up trade deals for a new British Empire.

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But I was wrong.

The chief political correspondent for the Daily Telegraph, no less, wrote a piece on just that subject only yesterday in his august comic.

He writes: Ministers have held talks about commissioning a new Royal Yacht Britannia which will be a “showcase for everything that is best in Britain”, The Daily Telegraph can disclose.

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So there you go. Everything that is best in Britain post Brexit. Can you just imagine?

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What else can they sell?

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Munguin is happy to compile a list of other items that can be sold on. Donations of ideas positively encouraged.

Oh, and if anyone has a spare magic money tree in their back garden…

THE BALL’S IN THEIR COURT

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Apparently Mrs May is set to tell the Commons that, following her speech in Florence (where she told the Europeans that we had never liked them anyway, and always felt awkward in the same room as them…wasn’t she supposedly a remainer?), it was now up to them to come forward with a solution.

It seems to be “job done” as far as she is concerned.

This, from the text of her speech to Europe:

On the other hand, it seems that Philip Hammond says this:

And here’s wee Foxy.

And that appears to be true at VERY considerable costs. From the Telegraph:

Theresa May has decided to commit billions of pounds on preparing Britain to leave the European Union without a deal in a bid to save her premiership.

The spending, which will be “unlocked” in the new year if no progress is made with Brussels, is intended to send a signal to pro-Brexit MPs that she is serious about regaining the upper hand in the negotiations.

Dominic Raab tells the BBC that planning to leave with no deal is underway. The cost of this will be billions.

(So she’s prepared to spend billions on saving her premiership, according to a hardline Tory paper.  That magic money tree is beginning to look as if it is her personal property, to be used only in the event of some event threatening to derail her.)

It’s all very well throwing the ball to Europe and telling them it’s in their court but they seem to be throwing several different types of ball. Mr Barnier doesn’t know whether he needs a tennis racquet, a baseball bat, a golf club or a pair of football boots.

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But we can’t help thinking that “the ball’s on the slates”, rather than on anyone else’s court.

Wouldn’t be nice if Britain had a realistic coherent policy on Brexit?

  • With thanks to Ian Dunt for the quotes from May, Hammond’s ally and Fox.
  • Theresa May will say in the Commons today that after her Florence speech, “the ball is in [the EU’s] court”.

LIAM HAPLESS FOX’S DEPARTMENT TWEETS AND DELETES

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Correction, here’s what it means for you for a few months, till the UK leaves all that behind. Don’t you love that, although it is an EU/Canada treaty, somehow the EU flag has disappeared and another, relatively unassociated one, has replaced it? Odd that! A mere oversight, soon to be corrected, I suspect.

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But don’t get too attached to the jobs. Remember that in March 2019 they will dry up… Oh, and I see they haven’t removed the UK flag and replaced it with the other signatory to the treaty yet. Sure to happen soon, though. Don’t worry. It’s in the “capable” hands of Liam.

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Progressive you say? Taking people and the environment into account, you say?

Oh dear no. That would never do.

No, leave that nonsense to the progressive go ahead countries in the world. Much better for us to stay with the good old days of Empire where folk knew their place, we knew where we were and what was what.

But, strangely, still no one in Liam’s department has sorted the flags thing out. Probably too busy with plans for the royal yacht that Liam’s going to sail around the world on accompanied by Kate Middleton.

But wait! Having Tweeted this last night, the Department for International Trade, more of which you can read about here, removed these tweets this morning. They must have seen the flag error at last.

Or maybe someone pointed out to them that rejoicing in the good fortune of Europe, fortune the UK will not benefit from for more than a few months, only made the UK look sadder and more lonely and isolated.

Still, maybe Liam will sort out his royal yacht and sail off into the sunset, Kate at his side and retake the Empire for his Queen.

I wonder if William will hang out with Adam while they are off on their adventures.

RANDOM THOUGHTS

Journalists, and amateur bloggers, of all political persuasions, make mistakes. (I readily acknowledge culpability).

No one is perfect and even with meticulous checking, some little errors can be left unnoticed.

However, it seems that no one ran this piece on Michelle Thomson past the most basic of fact checks.

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Additionally, it seems to me that to describe property worth £1 million as an “empire”, in these days of inflated property prices, is a tad of an exaggeration.

It’s not too difficult for professionals to check on these things before they put them in print. Indeed, it is very much easier than it used to be. A few Google searches takes a great deal less time than endless phone calls or searching physically through back copies of newspapers.

Maybe our journalists should consider that.

The Herald has corrected these mistakes in a short paragraph and Michelle Thomson has acknowledged this on Twitter.

Noting thanks for corrections today from KMcK article printed Saturday. Online changed quickly.

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Can Munguin take this opportunity to point you in the direction of Ian Dunt’s excellent piece on today’s Customs Proposal Paper by the UK government? Guy Verhofstadt described it as fantasy.

Guy Verhofstadt has described the proposals as fantasy. Not the best of starts, but as I read Ian’s piece I became convinced that M Verhofstadt was being quite complimentary.

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It seems that what they are proposing is that they spend billions to set up a complex method of replicating the customs union with unproven electronic gadgetry, and a good deal of trust in systems and personal honesty, and ending up with what we already have, but not quite so good.

“Lunatics”, “asylum” and “have taken over”, are all words that come to mind.

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Thanks, Labour. Brilliant idea.

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Has anyone seen Theresa?

Just asking because you’d think that, with a two-year deadline on her to deliver the most complex set of international negotiations undertaken by the UK in 70 years, a cabinet falling down around her ears and biting chunks out of each other, and having wasted 2 months on a pointless election, she might have thought it propitious to take a short break and return to her desk to get on with the day job.

So, if you see her, could you point her in the direction of England, lest she has become lost, or some might say, even more lost…

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FOR HEAVEN’S SAKE…

There’s daft, then there’s stupid, then there’s mad as a box of frogs, then, Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you  Mr Liam Fox:

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Firstly, Liam, all male MPs wear ties all the time in the chamber. The Speaker, until very recently, would have throw them out if they didn’t. Do you mean that ALL MPs should wear them? Including your boss Mrs May?  Or do you mean they should wear them all the time? Allegedly Mr Rees Mogg stands up for ‘God Save the Queen’ even when he’s in the bath. (Take a lesson Mr Corbyn.) I wonder if  Jacob already wears a tie for that?

But, Liam, the UK makes other things besides ties.

What about these wonderful jams? Should MPs wear raspberry or strawberry?

Even Govey… yes, GOVEY…looks like he thinks yer mad.

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I’m wondering if Mr Werrity has a tie business…