WAS MAY ALWAYS A LEAVER?

AND WOULD SHE PERSONALLY WELCOME A HARD BREXIT?

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Parlonsfrançais ; c’est une anglaise, elle nous ne comprendra pas.

I’ve recently read suggestions that Mrs May was always a Leaver.

However, as the Home Secretary in a government which stood for Remain, and given that it seemed unlikely that Leave would win, during the referendum campaign of 2016, she pretty much sat on the fence, making occasional, and rather reluctant, statements supporting the government’s Remain line.

Given that politicians rarely do anything actually totally principled, this line was presumably adopted in order that she could be seen as a contender for leadership when Remain won and Cameron eventually stood down in a UK which would still be inside the EU.

Aye, well, the best-laid plans o’ mice and men… and politicians, eh?

Leave won and Cameron, although he said he wouldn’t do, resigned the prime ministership, and then a few days later, although he said he wouldn’t do, he resigned his seat, bought his  £25,000 shed and disappeared in disgrace, into obscurity (hopefully forever).

So then a rag-tag of ridiculously inappropriate and underqualified people stood for the leadership and so, by default, the job of prime minister. She had to join them; this would be her last chance. Although she must have known that it was a thankless task.

Jeremy Corbyn notwithstanding, it was relatively unlikely that a Conservative party that had taken a Britain divided every which way could form a government once it was over and done. And who could guarantee that Corbyn wouldn’t be replaced by someone electable?

Anyone in the Conservative Party with even the slightest potential to be a ‘leader’ swerved what was going to be the job from hell. They say every political career ends in ignominy, but this one was going to be a bobby dazzler of an end. And so the line up was a load of also-rans. Particularly unfortunate when it could be argued that REAL leadership was needed in 2016 more than any time in the last 70 years.

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Wedding bells.

Fox, the already disgraced ex-minister, ex- leadership candidate, ex doctor,  with a history of outrageous expenses claims and a relationship with Adam Werrity which saw him give his unvetted young friend access to the MoD and highly confidential meetings at home and abroad, managed 16 votes).

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Meet me behind the bike sheds.

Crabbe, the hard-right Christian, anti-gay, who thought it appropriate to vote to reduce benefits for disabled people by £30 a week and who resigned his cabinet post after it was discovered that his Christian beliefs and marriage did not preclude his engaging in “inappropriate” texting to a young woman. (He later repeated this behaviour as a backbencher and so it wasn’t a one-off aberration.) Also, in the expenses scandal, it could be said that he used the system to maximum effect, spending our money to do up a place he went on to sell shortly thereafter, and transferring his second home allowance to his first home. He managed a whole 34 votes. Not as embarrassing as Foxy, but close!

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My wife wants to be prime mistress

Gove, the idiots’ idiot. Or maybe he’s just Sarah Vine’s idiot? He’s more a figure of fun than anything else, from his strange vocal delivery and mannerisms to his never-failing ability to put his foot in it. He too is a committed Christain, so committed in fact that he gave a copy of the King James bible to every school in England and Wales when he was their secretary of state for Education. His first act in government was to announce and publish a list of cost-cutting measures including stopping school building projects. Unfortunately when he announced this in the Commons with a flourish, it was still a work in progress and Govey ended up with egg on his face. To try to avoid personal criticism, he blamed the snafu on his Civil Servants! Good start to a ministerial career. In addidtion, he too had some rather dubious expenses, some of which he paid back. For all that he racked up 46 votes.

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Leadsom the fox hunter, was the candidate that you would have said was from the left field if she hadn’t been so right wing. I’d never heard of her, and when I heard her speak I felt I could understand why. To call her unimpressive would have been massively overrating her and a bit of an insult to the word “overrated”. She too, of course, had some skeletons in her cupboard including donations from a brother-in-law in Guernsey, which is abroad. She was accused of beefing up her pre-political CV full of senior jobs in finance. And not without reason. It was said that when she was “City Minister”  she was “seen by departmental officials as “a disaster”, “the worst minister we ever had. … She found it difficult to understand issues or take decisions. She was monomaniacal, seeing the EU as the source of every problem. She alienated officials by continually complaining about poor drafting.” In other words, she excused her thickness by blaming it on officials. Again, a seriously bad move.  And everything from the cost of champagne to Britain losing the Eurovision was the fault of Brussels! She managed to upset a lot of people by pointing out that May would be an inappropriate Prime Minister because she didn’t have any children. (Just imagine if a man had said that!) For all that she managed 84 votes on the second ballot and then withdrew before the members’ ballot leaving May the winner. (I have the distinction of being blocked by her on Twitter! It’s a bit like an OBE, but better.)

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It does seem so naughty doing this. Now let’s see when I get back to the office, I’ll shred all the files for the Windrush people and we’ll be able to refuse them medical treatment, and employment and then deport them (evil laugh!) 

May herself was, as I said, a useless candidate. She had a reputation for being anti-immigration, anti-foreigner and for being intransigent, unlikely to take advice from anyone but her husband and, as Ken Clarke said, “a bloody awkward woman”. As Home Secretary, she was responsible for a multitude of measures to make life more difficult for people from outwith the UK. Many of which had consequences that even a robotic operator like her should have been able to see. Making employers and landlords responsible for checking immigration status was bound to lead to anyone who looked even slightly foreign being refused accommodation or work. The “go home” vans and the destruction of Windrush papers were the tip of the iceberg.  And that’s before you start on other matters like the ‘mess’ she made of the sex abuse scandal. The shredding machines in the Home Office must have worked overtime on her watch.

She had told people (specifically her friend, Damien Greene, of the ‘porn at work’ scandal) when she was “up” at Oxford, that she wanted to be Prime Minister. Margaret Hilda was, at that time destroying the fabric of the country from her grace and favour in Downing Street, and it seems that May wanted to follow in her footsteps. (I mean did you hear the drivel on the steps of Downing Street? St Francis eat your heart out!)

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Everything about May points to her being anti-European. And the way that she has embraced the hard right ERG group and the DUP suggests that that is where her sympathies lie. Surely it didn’t escape her (or advisors’) notice that the Irish situation was fraught enough without her going into an expensive de facto coalition with an extreme BritNationalist party filled with a visceral hatred of “Catholic” Europe and with blood-red lines to prove it.

She has refused to work with Scotland and the majority in Northern Ireland to try to work out any kind of compromise, although it is clear from the Danish experience, that that could have been a possibility, and she seems to have no rapport at all with the more moderate members of her own party like Grieve, Soubry, Clarke and Heseltine, whom she actually sacked.

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I’m so sorry your magisterial magnificence. Next time I shall wear a wider skirt and I’ll be able to curtsey lower like the obedient Britannic subject I am.

She seems to have made no effort to soften the deal in any way and she has insisted that the bad deal that she made is the only deal and may be heading for failure in these last three weeks before we leave.  She’s shown no inclination to investigate the allegations of corruption and dark money allegedly associated with Leave Campaign and has insisted from day one that the tiny majority was the will of the British people.

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Sounds like a fanatic to me.

No, honestly, everything will be just fine

Ah, wait, if we can’t eat our pets… what about our neighbours?

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Oh, I say DOCTOR Fox,

What happened to the 40 trade deals you told us you’d have ready on the day we left.

So far, I understand that Switzerland and the Faroe Islands have signed up. And given that you’ve flown around the world 4 times, first class, in the getting of them, I think that’s fairly crap value for money, don’t you?

I’m also rather dubious about the Uk being the 5th largest economy in the world given that the USA, China, Japan, India and Germany are bound to be bigger… not to mention probably France. Certainly, after Brexit, it will be lucky to be the 15th largest…

Unless you count the market in black market food.

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I’d say that Nigel Farage’s new party just made a no deal Brexit a lot more likely, given that if the Maybot fails to do what “the British people ‘apparently’ voted for”, ie cut their throats and stab themselves in the heart, then the Tories will lose big time to old Nigel at the next election.

Oh, what fun we are having.

Start stockpiling.

YOU HAVE TO LAUGH

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I have to admit it, I’m a Twitter addict.

After Munguin’s Republic (to read your comments), it’s invariably the first thing I look at on the net.

On a regular basis, I see silly tweets from a wide variety of politicians, Scottish and otherwise. My favourites are, of course, the likes of Richard Leonard, demanding that the SNP take water back into public ownership, pay Glasgow council female employees fairly, or something equally embarrassing that Labour is failing to do in Wales or failed to do during their 13-year tenure in Downing Street, but that the SNP MUST do, and Labour would definitely do were it to ever gets its hands on power in Scotland.

Even sillier are tweets from the likes of Murdo Fraser about the Queen’s Eleven, almost certainly typed later on in the evening, if you get my drift!

There is no shortage of Tories making idiots of themselves on Twitter. Miles Briggs, Ross Thomson, Jackson Carlaw, to name but a few. And my favourite: Jamie Greene.

Today in true Greene style, Jamie hit out at the First Minister, who has been on business in the USA and Canada.

He accompanied this graphic (did he pay staff to do it, tut tut, or is he a wee whiz on the ‘puter himself?) with text that read…

“If Nicola Sturgeon wants to go to the US to talk about independence then the should pay for it. The Scottish taxpayer should not be left with a bill of thousands of pounds so that the First Minister can fly first class, grandstand and talk up .”

Now, the reason I mention this is not to highlight Jamie’s graphic or literary skills.

Rather, I wanted to show the utter pointlessness of this kind of tweet.

It raised a lot of interest, of that, no doubt. I counted roughly 200 replies and there may be more by now. And, of course, I didn’t read every one in detail, but from what I could see, not one single person was agreeing with Jamie. (I’ll take that back if someone finds a supportive tweet. As I say, I didn’t read every one.)

Now, given that one criticism of Twitter is that people tend to follow and be followed by,  people with roughly the same outlook and opinions, and given that Jamie is a Tory list MSP, you might expect that the bulk of his followers would be Conservatives or at least have Conservative leanings.

It seems, then, a bit strange that there is so little support for his tweet.

On the contrary, people have laid into this intervention with some interesting counter facts.

Firstly, of course, as various people pointed out, Nicola Sturgeon didn’t go to the USA to talk about independence, she went on a trade mission. That is a part of her job.

Any idiot could have found that out in any number of ways.

Well, I’ll rephrase that, almost any idiot could.

Jamie also seems concerned that Nicola travelled first class.

Now I have no idea whether on not she did. I suspect that on a transatlantic flight, where you are expected to start work, be photographed and do interviews the minute you deplane, it wouldn’t be a bad idea to do so.

I’m sure that her counterpart in London doesn’t travel tourist on these flights.

And I’m sure that when Fluffy took himself off on a trade mission to South America on behalf of the British government, he didn’t travel steerage. So there really is a bit of a pot and kettle thing going on there.

The job of the first minister includes representing Scotland all over the world. That’s the deal. It specifically says that in her job description: “ promoting and representing Scotland at home and overseas”. Not to do so would be a dereliction of duty, and as far as I know, all first minister, regardless of party, have done it. I suspect that they too did not travel tourist.

So far so bad, Jamie.

Many tweeters point out a series of other facts to Jamie, just in case he was unaware of them, a fair number concerning the incompetence, wastefulness and general slackness regarding taxpayers money in matters within the purview of the government run by his own party.

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That one is my favourite… (To be fair I really really dislike Foxy, the disgraced former defence minister.) And there’s a wee additional comment to that particular graphic.

One guy pointed out that there was, in fact, a trade deal ready to sign.

It’s with the Faroe Islands, and according to him, it’s for whelks! (I’m sure you appreciate, knowing my love of the Nordic nations, that I mean no disrespect to the people of the Faroe Islands. I’ll bet it’s for more than Whelks. But Liam did promise us 40 deals just awaiting his signature on behalf of the queen, and no matter how good the trade deal with Thorshavn, Whelks won’t sustain us far into April. Keep up the good work your doctorness.)

As always in these matters, people do kinda go off topic ever so slightly, and mention is made of a fair few matters, not in the least concerning Nicola and her job, rather matters where the UK government has wasted endless amounts of Scottish and British taxpayers’ money.

One interesting one, I thought, was in the matter, recently in the news, of Labour MPs being bribed with cash for their constituencies to vote for Theresa’s hairbrained scheme to leave the EU, but to tie Britain to all its strictures without giving it any say in their composition. In fact, not so much “taking back control”, rather giving away the very considerable control that they had (a veto on some matters and a heavily balanced qualified majority vote on others).

It concerns a letter to the Times (no less) from Lord Thomas of Gresford QC (no less).

It seems that Jamies’ prime minister may be skating on very thin ice in this respect. And, that being the case in respect of Labour MPs,  may she not also have done so in the matter of the cash bribe(s) to Arlene’s Orange Fest?

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Nice of Jamie to facilitate the more open discussion of this matter, not (as far as I know) aired much by the BBC and hidden away in the august setting of the relatively little read  Times’ letters’ page.

Jamie’s tweets may be read here.

ANOTHER MEANINGLESS SOUNDBITE FROM MAYBOT

 

Well, everyone today is talking about the humiliating defeat of May, the triumph of the Scottish Labour, Scottish Green, SNP and Scottish Liberal Democrat MPs along with Jo Maugham QC, the advice on Northern Ireland and the fact that Fluffy STILL hasn’t resigned, and how utterly idiotic Liam Fox sounded at a committee hearing talking about the Commons stealing Brexit from the British people.

I think in the last of these he must have been getting confused with the following little matter from 10 years ago.

In the 2009 expenses scandal, he was the Shadow Cabinet minister found to have the largest over-claim on expenses and, as a result, was forced to repay the most money.

So, as you can read about that anywhere, we’ll just cover the hopefully soon-to-be ex-prime minister discard what the UN has said about poverty in Britain after 10 years of austerity and repeat another of her meaningless sound bites.

Hearty apologies if this post doesn’t work out right. WordPress has offered up a new template to write with, and it’s taking some getting used to. 

RANDOM THOUGHTS

It appears, from Radio 4’s Today programme interview, that Liam Fox wants to hold US/UK trade deal talks in secret.

You might well wonder why.

Well, maybe it’s because it will allow corporate lobbyists to influence the talks while the UK public and parliament will have no idea what is on the table as quid pro quo.

What you reckon Mr Fox… Oh sorry, DOCTOR Fox, wants to hide from us?

NHS?

Workers’ rights?

Agriculture?

Environmental standards?

Fracking licences?

Foreign affairs?

Defence?

Is it because, if it is done in public, the “ordinary” people will see the UK fold its tent every time the US makes a demand?

What do you think?

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Also on the Today programme, the BBC out and out lied about Africa and trade deals. Mrs May is in South Africa to drum up support for a future trade agreement.

Mike Galsworthy pointed out:

Argh! talking crap about why we have “huge tariffs” on “African countries” & whether we can lower tariffs. This is ignorant. 33 African countries have ZERO tariffs to EU – coz they fall under “Everything But Arms” agreement.

Also, on top of this, the EU has various deals with African regions in development, aimed at helping Africa integrate into global trading system (EU is Africa’s biggest trading partner)

The EU has *huge* interest in the economic development & stability of Africa… especially given the proximity and immigration issues. With these trade deals, I understand EU even planning to invest to help African producers meet EU quality levels to help boost exports to EU.

Small wonder that the BBC’s “flagship” news programme has lost 800,000 listeners in a year.

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That’s £500,000,000 per annum, by the way.

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NOW WE ARE SERIOUSLY LOOKING AT NO DEAL

Brexit: What the Hell Happens Now?: 2018 Edition by [Dunt, Ian]

Not long after the referendum, Terry Entoure pointed me in the direction of “Brexit: What the Hell Happens Now?” a book by Ian Dunt, the editor of Politics.co.uk.

In the first chapter, Dunt paints a doomsday scenario of a no deal exit, a scary, dystopian vision of the future. I was seriously worried by the time I finished. Fortunately, right at the end of the chapter, he admits that this is an absolute worst case scenario and highly unlikely to happen. The rest of the book is a little more upbeat.

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But because the different factions of the Tories and the DUP can’t agree on anything that would be even halfway acceptable to each other, never mind the European Union, and the clock that Monsieur Barnier pointed out was ticking over a year ago, is still heading to that 11 pm deadline on March 29, 2019, it is beginning to look like that is what we are heading for. For those in doubt, this is what it would look like.

May has always said that “no deal is better than a bad deal”, but frankly it isn’t true, any more than her other witterings have been… you know, like “being very clear” about stuff, and being “strong and stable” in government.

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Today David Dark Money Mundell, a man who makes Jim Murphy look like a  halfway decent Secretary of State for Scotland, has said that a no deal scenario would be preferable to the break up of the United Kingdom.

That as the UK government admitted that it was stockpiling medicines and foods against this eventuality, emergency measures are being drawn up, notes of advice will be issued to households over the coming months and Jacob Rees Mogg, Brexiter Extraordinaire admits that the UK could be looking at 50-60 years of austerity.

It’s all an awfully long way from £350 million a week for the NHS.

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I can only imagine that Muddle is speaking for himself on this matter. As a Cabinet Minister, I assume he wouldn’t be obliged to suffer any of the privations that the rest of us would endure. But of course, his seat around the cabinet table and the ministerial car and fat salary would disappear overnight were there no Scotland to Secretary of State for.

He most certainly isn’t talking for me, but then, I doubt that in his entire life he has ever spoken up for the likes of us… you know, ordinary Scottish people.brexitstamsp

Still … look on the bright side, folks… We can always laugh at this stupid arse.

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MORE BREXIT MADNESS

Iron Lady made of  Papier Mâché

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So, how many dead for Brexit?

b
Aye, the trouble is that most of them will be Mr Bun the Baker.

berex

b1
Well, that’s a relief.

b3
You just stick to what you’re best at mate, drinking and smoking.

b2
Pity that the easiest thing in human history is proving too hard for you, you bloody disgrace.

bre999
How long before they are calling on us to display the Dunkirk Spirit?

br boris eu
Well, well…

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So Davis has gone, but is his replacement any less ridiculous?

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And, talking of ridiculous…

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Yes, Lord Bramall, it is. Indeed it is.

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Stunning. What did she promise Dacre for that? Lord Dacre of Brexit?

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And today they managed to make their own policies illegal…

Breden
Oh yes. Let’s be like Denmark.

Some Random Pictures

Because things have been hectic for us today… Sorry!

 

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This is Bertie the Blackbird, who is fond of sultanas but turns up his beak at currents! Go figure how fussy some of my animals are.

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He’s not averse to the odd worm though.

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Part of a friend’s garden.

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Getting overgrown at Munguin Towers. Good for hiding in though…

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Munguin likes to oversee the gardening, usually in conversation with Lord Buddha Voldermort whose company he seems to prefer to mine… Odd animal.  BTW someone could do with a bath!

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Sometimes he chats with his tortoise instead…

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Or even climbs a tree…

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But mainly he sits on his fat lazy butt in the sun, while someone fetches and carries for him.

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This fella is a random dog we met outside the best chip shop in Dundee, Glenns in King Street, Broughty Ferry. Even if they weren’t staunch independentistas (which they are), the food would still be pretty fantastic.

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This is  Albus Fumblepaws. As Jim points out, there can be little doubt about which country he comes from.

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Albie for short..well, come on, who’s gonna shout ALBUS FUMBLEPAWS across the park?

Finally, BJSAlba sent me this link today. It’s absolutely hilarious. Well worth a read, but not while you are drinking tea!

 

NOW WHY WOULD THE BBC MISS THAT OUT?

Sympathies to the now ex-employees of Maplins and Toys R Us. The UK is a pretty bad place to find yourself unemployed. The UK government (although by and large NOT most of the DWP staff) will treat you as if you are some sort of thieving, lowlife criminal out to take money away from doing up Buckingham Palace or HS2, just because you need to feed your family and pay your rent. They will demand that you take any work, no matter how unsuited you may be to it, and if you turn up a few minutes late at one of their appointments, in the diminished number of jobcentres, miles away from where you live, for any reason at all, they will do their best to starve you and your family. So I hope you find work very soon.

I fear that this is just the start of what is coming at us, and to suggest that it is nothing to do with Brexit is to live in a Narnia-like world…. where, should you wish to visit, you will doubtless encounter David Davis avoiding Michel Barnier, Boris Johnson setting up congestion charging on the Irish border, DOCTOR Fox taking Mr Werrity on a government-funded trip on a new Royal Yacht Britannia, Jacob Rees Mogg and Nanny in the Bently, the Maybot, being trailed around like a rag doll by her boss, Arlene and of course Humpty Dumpty and the Mad Hatter.

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From Jolyon Maugham QC…

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Going back to the BBC… part of the Today Programme this morning came from Northern Ireland and at least one interview from Derry. I’m wondering if it was a BBC policy that the interviewer should refer to it as LONDONderry?