MORE RANDOM THOUGHTS

Remember when Jeremy Clarkson punched a BBC producer in the face because he couldn’t get steak for his dinner?

Well, now it appears that he is sick of hearing about the inadequacy of the English meals provided for kids whose parents are would normally qualify for free school meals.

Free school meals: How you can help children in need | The Independent

<Clarkson said that a woman requesting to be given supermarket vouchers instead of the food boxes was “presumably [doing it] so that she could exchange it at the supermarket for fags and scratch cards”>.

Or maybe, Mr Clarkson, given that the government, that is the taxpayer, is paying a private company £30 per child for these packages, which are supposed to last for 10 days, they would actually like £30 worth of food, the woman just th0ught the kids should get a bit more out of it.

I mean, half a tomato and half a pepper and a tiny piece of carrot… Is this global Britain leading the world? I know we should all be fighting obesity, but starving people to death is probably at the extreme end of the solutions available.

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Well, you might know with the Brits, it has to do with “commercial confidentiality”. Never mind openness; never mind people’s health, let’s make sure no one finds out anything that is commercially confidential. I wonder what the Brits are trying to hide.

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Two US National Guards have been pulled from Inauguration duty tomorrow, because of links to the Far Right

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Why is this not a scandal? Why are people not calling for Johnson to go? Why are the Scottish Tories whining about what a terrible job Nicola Sturgeon is doing, while their own English government is making such a pig’s ear of this pandemic?

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Douglas Ross MP

If it means stopping the SNP and their push for indyref2, I would be part of a unionist coalition. The last Scottish Labour leader wouldn’t work with us. Will you @AnasSarwar @MonicaLennon7?

Monica Lennon

That’s very flattering Douglas but it’s a red card from me. See you on the campaign trail where we’ll be fighting for radical social and economic change, not a political agenda that looks after the wealthy few.

Oh, dear, Dougie no mates. Richard Leonard wouldn’t touch you with a tarry pole and now candidate, Monica Lennon takes the same view.

I wonder what millionaire, Anas Sarwar will have to say to that.

After this, I suspect that even his answer will be a polite but firm Nah!

UPDATE

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Nah, Dougie, mate. It wasn’t working with unionists. It was working with Tories. There’s a difference.

Both candidates know that your party is toxic. The UK election after they joined with you in UKOK and Better Together, they lost 97% of their seats. They’ve never recovered. And if that’s not enough, look at what happened to the Liberal Democrats after their coalition with your party in London. I suppose you could try Willie Rennie, although as 5th largest party out of five, I’m not sure that even if he agreed, it would do you much good. Especially as his English boss just ruled out re-joining the EU.

Afterprints Danger Hazardous Toxic Waste Skull Bones Symbol Metal Aluminum  Sign 12x12: Amazon.co.uk: Garden & Outdoors
Scottish Labour to ditch Better Together alliance with Tories in IndyRef2 -  Daily Record

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Caption?

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RANDOM THOUGHTS

I noted that Parler, the hard right social media platform, so favoured by Trump and his supporters, shut down recently because none of the app providers wanted their companies to be associated with it, had among its contributors, the ever lovely Tories James Cleverly, Nadine Dories and the Brexit Burger, Michael (Sniffy) Gove. Steve Baker and Ben Bradley also joined up along with other less known names from the Cons.

Mad Nad.

I’ve often wondered why the broadcasters here pronounce the name similarly to “parlour”, when the obvious way to me, would be “parlay”…as it presumably means “to speak”. Anyone?

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Ain’t he pretty, all dressed up in his party frock?

The SNP has been accused of being out of touch because they have launched an independence task force at a time when well over 50% of the population wants independence. Meanwhile the Noble and Aristocratic Lord McConnell says from his vantage point on a comfortable red bench, that the bulk of us don’t want a referendum at the moment. He probably thinks we should wait till 2055, like his friend, De Pfeffel Johnson. It’s the rarefied air that the upper classes breathe that does it, methinks.

So 57% want independence, but they don’t want a referendum, you Nobleness… Is that what you’re saying?
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Ummmmmmmmmm… But Boris has launched one for the 43% so they don’t feel left out and to show how much he loves them he’s put Michael Gove and some bloke who lost his seat at the last election, in charge. Isn’t he just lovely!

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Where would we be were it not for the wisdom and kindness of our betters… The Noble Lord Sumption, for example?

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Priti Patel: A timeline of how the scandal developed from a family  'holiday' to a near-certain sacking | The Independent | The Independent
I was looking for a picture of the Home Secretary, but this bag lady will have to do.

Has anyone worked out how the Home Office, under Ms Patel, managed to lose so many important criminal records? I thought they did daily backups of information of such import.

I saw this tweet which might be the answer…

Hazie @DavidHazie

I work in the scientific research & everything is backed up, you can only ever lose a days data at the most. Considering how important info on criminals is, you’d imagine the Home Office would at least do the same or has it been outsourced & that’s the real problem?

Whatever… it does seem really inefficient even for for global Little Britain and its notoriously chaotic Home Office!

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If this is correct and if millionaire donors are the people who decide the leadership of the party, then it’s not much of a surprise that Richard Leonard was sacked. I guess his coat was on a shoogly peg when Sir Keir took over the England and British branch. They have very little in common. I wonder though, what Sir Keir has in common with ordinary Labour members in Scotland. Mr Sarwar, on the other hand…

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Thanks, Brenda, for drawing my attention to this poetic masterpiece.

SOPPY SUNDAY

1. Hello everybody. Munguin’s sent me to welcome you to Soppy Sunday. Now I’m off to play. You have fun. Shout if you want anything.
2. Another smiley face. Loads of happy animals today…
3. Brrrrrrrr….
4. Even the roads look like spaghetti in Italy.
5. Did someone say “breakfast”?
6. Angus countryside must be among the nicest in the country.
7. Lions need a lot of sleep. And it’s not called beauty sleep for nothing. How else would we get so handsome?
8. I’m watching you…
How Thimphu became the capital of Bhutan | The story of Thimphu city
9. Thimphu, Bhutan.
10. That Andi bloke been out again with his camera. I’m wondering what he pays for sittings. Loads of grubs, I hope.
11. Who’s driving?
12. Munguin in his office doing a quality check on last week’s Soppy Sunday and negotiating a fee with that squirrel. How many nuts?
13. Who could ask for more.
14. You haven’t been flossing like we agreed at your last appointment, have you?
Manatees: Fact or Fiction Quiz | Britannica
15. I’m not really sad… that’s just how manatees’ faces are.
16. All dressed up in best finery for a night on the town.
17. The Blue Mosque, Mazar-i- Sharif, Afghanistan.
18. Winter in Finland.
Abortion in sheep - consider vaccination now to prevent losses | Agri-Food  and Biosciences Institute
19. This is our field. You need the password to get in.
20. This is one of our teachers. She’s a rather strange looking Orangutan, but she’s nice enough anyway. Oh, look… time up. You’ll have to go now. See you next week.

Thanks to Dave A, Dave S and Andimac.

ALL A BIT FISHY

One of my big problems with the bunch of incompetent muppets who comprise the current BritNat government is that they don’t take anything seriously.

The Tories seem to have lost most of their grown ups over the last few years and have replaced people like Anna Soubry, Dominic Grieve and Ken Clarke with a mixture of dimwits, even dimmerwits and utter jokers.

Victoria Prentis MP writes about Boris Johnson for the Banbury Guardian |  North Oxfordshire Conservatives

For example, the woman who had a measure of responsibility for fishing and the EU (ie the English fisheries minister Victoria Prentis) was organising a nativity trail on Christmas Eve when the Brexit deal was agreed. Obviously, this meant that she didn’t have time to read it, because clearly Christmas had to come first (and presumably there was no one else bright enough around in Oxford to organise a nativity trail???) .

To be honest I’m pretty certain it would have made no difference at all if she had read it. Almost undoubtedly she wouldn’t have understood it, or what it meant for the fishermen, with whom I suspect she has precious little contact in her constituency in Oxford.

It also came to light that Ms Prentis’s solution to the problems with exporting fish to the EU is that we should eat it ourselves.

Well, maybe we’ll have to, but being fed the vast numbers of Mackerel that are landed by British boats may stick in the throat of even the most Blitz Spirit-enthused Brit. Mackerel past, Mackerel pie, Mackerel stew, Mackerel Goulash…?

Obviously, people like Jacob Rees Mogg wouldn’t consider anything as coarse as Mackerel for a meal, but I’m sure he’ll force feed it to his servants.

With half the fleet tied up and fishing boats losing income, I imagine that the fish are somewhat relieved. And Mr Rees Mogg, who is paid to work in parliament…on a sizable hourly rate… is telling the so-called Mother of Parliaments just how happy being British (and presumably NOT being caught) is making them.

Seriously, this is the British government!

Can someone please get me out of here?

RANDOM THOUGHTS

A Supermercado in Spain this weekend..

Now, keeping in mind how “they need us more than we need them”…

This was Sainsbury in Cambridge, England on Friday. (Thanks to MrJunkerBarlow on Twitter.)

Fortunately, however, many Brexiteers, it seems, don’t do that much fruit and veg shopping so they’ll likely be less affected than us Europeans. Try not to swoon, ladies!

Mind you there’s some seriously unpatriotic drinking doing on there… I see European beers… Murphy’s is brewed in Cork, in the EU and Kronenbourg 1664 comes from  originally from Straßburg, now Strasbourg which is also in the EU. What’s wrong with good old British Ale?

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I know the BBC isn’t generally known these days for attention to detail, but since when were Birmingham and Bristol in Wales, and Manchester in the sea. I know things are bad in England, but whole towns trying to escape Boris? Well done, Newcastle, You’ve very nearly reached a sane place.

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Freedom of movement of sandwiches is no longer allowed…

Patel must be proud. No more foreign sandwiches!

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Apparently the number is 020 7930 4433. My advice would be to ring early. I’m not sure he takes calls after 4... or indeed if he is even capable of doing so! Hic.

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Aberdeen Council Tories have been saying for some time that they wish to bypass Edinburgh and get their funding direct from the imperial capital. This, of course, is impossible. Whether the Tories like it or not, Aberdeen is in Scotland. But the interesting things is that research by the House of Commons Library, which surely the councillors would have done before pushing this idea, has shown that Scottish councils would have been nearly £1.6 billion worse off since April 2016, if their annual funding was decided by the UK Parliament. Still, it’s only Jocks that would have had to go without.

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JUST FOR A LAUGH

1. More Poignant than funny… Thanks, Andimac.
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https://threadreaderapp.com/thread/1347778514888642561.html

Hilarious and worth a read…

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10. The box of chocolates said 500 grams. Why have a put on 2 kilos?
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Murphy showed up at Mass one Sunday and the priest almost fell down when he saw him. He’d never been to church in his life. 


After Mass, the priest caught up with him and said, “Murphy, I am so glad ya decided to come to Mass. What made ya come?” 

Murphy said, “I got to be honest with you Father, a while back, I misplaced me hat and I really, really love that hat. I know that McGlynn had a hat just like mine and I knew he came to church every Sunday. I also knew that he had to take off his hat during Mass and figured he would leave it in the back of the church. So, I was going to leave after Communion and steal McGlynn’s hat.”

Later, the priest said, “Well, Murphy, I notice that ya didn’t steal McGlynn’s hat. What changed your mind?” 

Murphy replied, “Well, after I heard your sermon on the 10 Commandments, I decided that I didn’t need to steal McGlynn’s hat after all” 

With a tear in his eye the priest gave Murphy a big smile and said, “After I talked about ‘Thou Shalt Not Steal’ ya decided you would rather do without  your hat than burn in hell?” 

Murphy slowly shook his head. “No, Father, after ya talked about ‘Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery’ I remembered where I left me hat.”

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Thanks to John, Russ, Erik, Brenda, Andimac, T, et merci à Claudine à Paris.