I’d have thought that the greatest privileges of being first minister would be serving the people who elected you, trying to make your country a better place across the board, improving conditions for ALL the people, rich, poor, old, young… protestant, catholic. Get the drift?

Why is your worthless commoner’s head above that of her Britannic Majesty’s royal one?

But for Arlene, sorry DAME Arlene, it was curtseying to a person, or people, who are made of exactly the same material as she is, but who hadn’t had to bother working their way to the elevated position they held, like she did.

They were born to it, or married into it.

Well, there you go.

It’s almost like you consider yourself to be his equal here. Upstart.

Oh, just a thought. Isn’t there something in your bible that says that ‘thou shalt not bow down to graven images’? Do the likes of Liz, Airmiles, Middleton or Money BAGS not count as the same sort of thing as graven images?

A graven image is an idol—an object or image, such as a statue, that is worshiped as the representation of a deity or god. The word graven means “carved” or “sculpted.” Graven image refers to some kind of object or image that has been made to represent a god.

Given that Liz is the head of the Church of England, just like the Pope (oh, did I say that word in front of you, sorry) is the head of the … well, you know… doesn’t she at least count as a sort of graven image?

Sorcha Ní Nia replied to her Ladyship: “she’s 96, Arlene, she’s probably got arthritis, christ give her a break!”


Well said, Patricia. What an utterly daft answer, Mr Raab. Deputy Prime Minister, did you say you were? Munguin wouldn’t employ you as his deputy tea maker or gentleman of the night soil.


This from Lindsay Bruce

Ciaran Martin was appointed Constitution Director in 2011.

Prior to that Ciaran was the lead official negotiator for the Prime Minister and Secretary of State for Scotland in the run-up to the Edinburgh Agreement in 2012 on a referendum on independence for Scotland.

Probably puts that one to bed.


And, just in case it doesn’t… BJ kinda proves it here.

And then there is this. You can’t suggest that we are all equal in this union if Northern Ireland can have a referendum every 7 years, by international agreement, but Scotland has to wait, how long was it that Secretary of State Union Jack suggested, 39 years?

Why does Mr Jack, presumably a Scotsman, think that Scots should have to wait that long while Northern Ireland can press ahead?

Is it because of what Patricia said in the first item of this post? Or more sinisterly, is it because of the possibility of trouble, or more accurately, Civil War in Northern Ireland?

And, just for a laugh… Remember not to quote the prime minister in the House of Commons. He’s considered vulgar.



Surely if it is “all the time”, you could remember ONE example of when you said something, maybe a light rebuke for beheading 84 people in one day, for example? You know. “I say , your royal highness, that was a bit over the top, beheading 84 people, still, I suppose it saves on pensions, eh, sire”. Still when you are absolutely desperate for trade deals, I suppose you sup with who and whatever. Just get yourself a long spoon, Liz.


Hetty sent me this. I thought you might enjoy it.



Travelling Truss didn’t care much to be reminded that she campaigned hard to keep Britain in the EU.
That Truss woman’s voice makes me fold back my ears.


River sewage is becoming a serious public health concern, Prof Sir Chris Whitty (Chief Medical Officer for England and Chief Medical Adviser to the UK Government since 2019) has warned, as he demanded that water companies do more to keep effluent out of Britain’s waterways. For which he means, I assume, England and Wales’s waterways.

Well, I never!

Who’d have thought that pumping raw sewage into rivers, at the rate that the water companies in England and Wales have been allowed to do, would cause there to be health fears in summer.

We can look forward to more of the same. Dysentery anyone? Polio? Oh wait, they already have that!


Which is all very well, but when you take out the number of people who form a part of the government… Cabinet ministers, junior ministers and bag carriers, etc., that’s to say, people who would lose their job and salary (or place on the bottom rung of the ladder) if they didn’t vote for him, he didn’t actually win the vote of confidence at all.

Sleeping beauty?

In theory and in practice, you can’t be a member of the government (called the payroll vote) if you have expressed no confidence in the prime minister, so whether you believe he’s a leader or a drooling, mumbling, moronic waste of space, you must vote with him… or resign.

The current payroll vote is between 160 and 170 MPs, consisting of:

  • 95 ministers (including whips) in the House of Commons
  • 47 parliamentary private secretaries
  • 20 Conservative MP trade envoys
  • an unknown number of party vice-chairs.

So let’s assume 160, to be generous to Johnson.

There were probably 361 Tory MPs at the time of the vote (two having lost their seats since then due to getting involved with tractors and underage boys).

So, 160 of these 361 MPs were ineligible to vote freely, leaving 201 voters with the freedom to express their opinion.

But 148 of them voted against Johnson.

Or, put another way 53 MPs voluntarily voted for him.

Of course, it is fair to say that many of the cabinet would have voted for him anyway… Some of them (Nadine) know that no one else would ever have promoted them to cabinet level. And some (Nadine) genuinely seem to like, or even love, and trust him.

But I seriously doubt he can now count on his party to back him, particularly since he lost 2 seats to Labour and the Liberal Democrats in last week’s by-elections.

It will be interesting to see the result of the NI protocol vote.



A cute secretary, none cuter,

Was replaced by a clicking computer;

’Twas the wife of the boss

Put the deal across,

You see the computer was neuter.



Fellow takes a work colleague home at 7.30pm without forewarning his wife.

She screeches at him: “My hair’s a mess. I’m in my old clothes. The dishes aren’t washed from breakfast. And you bring someone home without telling me!”

The guest is mouth agape.

“How can you do this to me?” she yells. Then she bursts into tears.

“He’s thinking of getting married,” says hubby. I’m just giving him a demo.”



A frightened man goes to the Russian secret police and says: “My talking parrot disappeared.”

“Why did you come here? Go to the regular police.”

“I will. I’m just here to tell you that I disagree with whatever that parrot is going to say.”



Negotiations between union members and their employer are at an impasse. The union denies that  workers are abusing their contracts’ sick-leave provisions.

The company’s chief negotiator heolds aloft a newspaper. “This man called in sick yesterday.”

There on the sports page is a photo of the supposedly ill employee, who has just won a local golf tournament with a sensational score.

Union negotiator: “Wow, think of what kind of score he could have had if he wasn’t sick!”


16. Some very odd statuary in Australia!

A shifty-looking fellow in a kilt walks into a London pub.

He orders a pint and very very carefully puts down the plastic bag he’s carrying.

Bartender: “What’s that?”


“Phew, is that all? I thought it might be bagpipes.”


18. Ooops.
22. Ouch.

Thanks to Andi, Quokka, John, Erik, Brenda, Graham, TM.


1. Morning all. Aunty Panda Paws said I could be in charge today and give these cousins of mine a day off, although I have a feeling they may slip in, unnoticed, and fail to pay the admission charge.
2. While all you apes argue about stuff, I’m just getting on with my pollination job.
3. Do you like my dog? He’s a duck’s best friend.
4. A lunch fit for an Orangutan.
5. Ooooow, did someone mention lunch?
6. This is what mummies is for.
7. A handy seat on a hot (yes, it was) Sottish Summer day, yesterday. And all at a very reasonable price!
8. What? I was sunbathing here. If you’re looking for Munguin he’s in the Towers.
9. Bulgarian snake, brought into the house by a certain bad cat and removed back to the garden by a certain brave RS!
10. Goat Moth Caterpillar doing some modelling for Munguin in Srem.
11. When he/she grows up, this is what he/she will look like.
12. La Paz, Bolivia.
13. More of the wildlife around Srem.
14. Migaloo, the Albino Whale who shows up at Byron Bay in Australia every year since 1991 normally in July. This article, from Quokka, is about whale watching.
15. Some animals, I don’t know. They walk in here and take over your job without a by your leave and pocket the salary too! Is there a union for poor little maltreated animals like me?
16. There’s been a shortage of birds this week!!! See to it, Tris.
17. You want a photograph? Oh, I see you do. OK, this is my best side.
18. Is that all you pay for modelling for Soppy Sunday? Sheesh! Vogue was never like this!
19. Cats is never satisfied, is they?
20. Well, did I do OK? Please put in a good word for me. I need the work!

Thanks to Andi, John, Kay, Minnie, Snake Tamer RS, Kenn, and Quokka.


I’ve read recently about hospitals setting up foodbanks for some of their staff who can’t afford to buy food on the wage they are paid.

Foodbanks have been established in Norfolk, Suffolk, West Hertfordshire,  Dartford and Gravesham, Sheffield and Birmingham.

And now British Telecom has a”community parlour” which supplied food to people who can’t make their wage stretch to the end of the month.

But it’s not a food bank. Oh no, not it.

Oh, and just by the way, BT reported profit (before tax) of £1,804,000,000 last year, Adam Crozier has a salary of £700,000 per annum and these are the salaries of the ordinary people who work for BT.


Not that I’m an apologist for Labour, but I’m pretty sure Kier Starmer has not backed the strikers. Exactly what effect that will have on trades union contributions to the Labour Party is yet to be seen.

Mr Starmer has said that no shadow cabinet members and no Labour MPs should show support. Although some, are defying him. But then, some Tories defy Mr Johnson and call for him to stand down, so not exactly a game changer.

Mr Sarwar was spotted ON the picket lines. I’m not sure why he has chosen to defy Mr Starmer or what he hopes to achieve by it. Any suggestions will be appreciated.

Johnson is trying to make us believe that during the pandemic “he” subsidised the railways workers to the tune of £600 per household. (Incidentally, a real bargain for those areas where there are few if any trains. Highlands and Islands, we thank you!)

And in any case, as Peter points out, that money went to the bosses.

The Railway unions are hardly in our good books. They advised their members (as Terry pointed out the other day) to vote for Brexit. And Brexit is a fair contributor to the cost of living crisis that we are all struggling with, so it’s not unreasonable to suggest that they may have contributed to the problems. On the other hand who knows how many of them did what the unions told them?

Judging by the arguments the union cited, only the gullible ones.

But stupid on stilts though that was, Brexit is only one of the contributors to the fact that wages are static and inflation is soaring. And what is most important is that we are seeing more and more people, often people in work, having to turn to food banks to feed themselves and their kids.

Most of Munguin’s friends and associates are comparatively comfortably off (he’s a posh animal), but even they are cutting back here and there as prices leap up. A run in the country to somewhere nice on Sundays replaced with a walk in the park, fewer meals out…

People in work need pay rises. (And no, we aren’t talking about THIS) Pensioners need pensions to be increased and people on benefits need to see their benefits rise in line with inflation. If you’re on British benefits there’s nothing spare and when your loaf of bread goes up by 12% and your benefits increase by 3%, you’re screwed!

I think we had better prepare for more of this over the summer.

Anyway, Munguin says good luck to Labour and the Liberal Democrats in tomorrow’s by-elections.

Remember the reasons for the by-elections. There were no tragedies. No one died, just a sex pest and a bloke doing what he should not have been doing while he was at work and we were paying him. OK, so another sex pest.

In the case of Wakefield, former Conservative MP Imran Ahmad Khan stood down after being convicted of sexually assaulting a 15-year-old boy in 2008. He was jailed for 18 months.

In Tiverton and Honiton, the seat became available when Tory MP Neil Parish resigned after admitting he had watched pornography on his phone twice while in the Commons chamber.