STRONG AND STABLE ON PLANET MAY

 

asrong
I can see that standing with legs apart might well mean stable. But strong?
atstrong
Just in case she forgets what’s in the manifesto.
atoryme
Fàilte gu beaga bìodach seo talla a ‘bhaile ann an Alba. Welcome to this tiny village hall in Scotland. Your English audience probably thinks it’s the main street in Edinburgh.
atory
Where are the other 26?
ATessy#
I’d stick to strong and stable if I were you, Tess.
brex
Your judgement?  Ah, yes.
Aliaer
No, it won’t.  That is an out and out lie. You have the mandate of the referendum for your negotiations.  Albeit by a relatively narrow squeak, I know, the English and Welsh voted for Brexit. That is the hand you play.  The EU has already said that it makes absolutely no difference to them what the outcome of the election is. You don’t understand the negotiating process at all.
a tory public appearanvce
Booked (a wedding party) for Theresa’s next visit to Scotland.

 

TIME FOR ANOTHER LAUGH AT THE MESS THEY CALL BREXIT…

 

brex1
Not the smartest tactician, is she?
brex5
Didn’t realise that Better Together’s and pooling and sharing meant sharing beds in hospital…?
brex
You see, we don’t want to be part of this idiotic nonsense called the EU, but we do want them to headquarter their agencies here. Obviously, duh!
Brexid
And once upon a time, they told us that Spain would be an obstacle to independence.
brexi2
I guess that that is not too unreasonable.
Bells
Very British Scot… Britch… Whatever! We’ll never buy it again. Incidentally, why do Brits find it necessary to put massive UK flags on just about everything in the supermarket from eggs to geraniums?
br2
Like we’ve said, she’s not the best negotiator, is she? Erm, anyone know what she IS good at? Maybe we should leave it to David Da… No, sorry. Momentary aberration. What was I thinking? Let’s leave it to Mickey the Mouse, shall we?
brexitmud
Bless Fluffy. He’s always been easily confused. And all this has just been too much for him.
brexit
That’s the deal, guys. Take it or leave it… Oh no, just take it!
Britfasc
Proud flag …why not put it on a whisky bottle, and everything else you can see?
brex4
Aye, Amber, you’re going to need more of these visas. Like for doctors, nurses, care assistants, plumbers, shop assistants, builders ad infinitum… I’d get printing visas fast as you can.
brecitscotland
So what you are saying is that you’ll hang on to all the powers over Scottish public services so that you can trade them with America for the seriously crap trade deal you’ll get. Sell off our water, and our heath service. You’ll maybe find that hard to do. We probably don;t really want that. We can be thrawn, you know!
England Fans
‘Gibraltar is ours, you Spanish bastards’, they screamed in a drunken frenzy in Madrid before their team lost. You can tell the Brits. They are the drunk, pale, overweight ones. Nice one Leicester. You must be proud. (The Express seemed to think that the police were heavy handed and it was all their fault…well, they were foreign police after all.)
brex3
Ha ha ha ha ha …imagine anyone having ANY kind of faith in a Whitehall computer system, The USA companies they usually get to design, supply and instal them must laugh their heads off every time they get a contract that will certainly end up 2 times over budget and no earthly use.

 

SHE SHOULD HAVE GONE TO SPECSAVERS

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Firstly it’s ridiculously unimportant in the great scheme of things, but as far as I can see, the word “EASTER” is still pretty prominent (as in the largest point size) here, at least in Scotland. And I only went to ADSA Opticians!

Secondly, I’m not entirely sure that the national Trust should be obliged to do any work promoting Christain festivals. David Cameron insisted that “we are a Christain nation”, but we’re not really, and neither should we be. People, not nations, should hold religious beliefs because, above all, beliefs are very individual things. As I’ve said so many times on this blog, I respect everyone’s right to their religious beliefs but I don’t expect them to be rammed down my throat.

Thirdly, I never cease to be amazed at the inordinate fuss that the state church, and when it thinks it’s useful to them, politicians, make of any diminution or watering down of Christian influence in our daily lives.

We mustn’t, in any way, stop Christmas being called Christmas, for example (even although it’s been referred to as the “holidays” for a long time in our big brother and mentor country, the USA). Happy Holidays.

agreed

No one seems to mind that we attach to Christmas, the supposed birth of Christ (which probably took place in October), the singularly biggest-ever festival of greed and waste known to man…well, with the possible exception of the Saxe Coburgs. We spend the best part of three months extolling our populace to spend, spend, spend. Borrow if you have to, to buy rubbish that they don’t want for people you don’t like, so that they can dump it on the next bin day. It doesn’t matter, as long as you make large amounts of money for organisations that are probably on the tax fiddle. From my memories of Bible Study at school, that was never what it was about. Oh Bah, Humbug, I hear you say.

And as for Easter, well,  should we attach Christianity to the fact that for the last month we’ve had aisles in supermarkets fair brimming with all manner of Easter Eggs? What are these Easter eggs again? Oh yeah,  fairly small (and gettings smaller) thin, pieces of chocolate in a cardboard box, with a small bar of chocolate or little toy inside them, selling for about twice what that weight of confection would normally sell for. Like Christmas Crackers…a rip off.

No complaints from the Church about that? Christmas festival a rip off…scilence. But don’t, whatever you do, forget to put Easter in your Egg competition, or the wrath of the highest bornof the land will descend upon ye.

asaudi-arabia-beheadings-rights

And so, the prime minister, a vicar’s daughter and a member of the National Trust… on a visit to a Middle Eastern dictatorship where you can be flogged or sentenced to death for converting to Christianity, or for being gay, or for criticising the king… and a list of other trivial “offenses… with the main purpose of selling arms, goes off on a rant about how ridiculous it is that Easter has been left out of the “egg hunt” (when it hasn’t).

To coin a word… JEEEEEEEZ!

Still, it takes people’s minds off the chaos that is Brexit.