WITH YOU THERE, PATRICK

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So… now what?

Well, let’s see. I know…why don’t we have a sing-song?

RANDOM THOUGHTS

Despite a reduction in our grant the numbers of staff in our NHS has continued to increase.
Hang your head in shame, Rudd.
Most people who go to sleep at work get sacked.

 

We realise that the other day we gave some publicity to the Daily Express. It is only just then, that we give some publicity to other racist newspapers.

Oh, well, if it is God’s will…

What a clever wee soul.

Be warned.

GROW UP YOU MORONS

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The Tories went into meltdown this afternoon over something that Corbyn may or may not have said under his breath about May.

It is possible that he said “stupid woman”, although many are saying that having seen the tape he said “stupid person”.

The Honourable, Honourable and Learned, Honourable and Gallant, and the Right Honourable versions of the same categories, spent what seemed like forever arguing with each other about the fine details of his insult.

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Andrea Fox-Hunter Leadsom made her usual ‘invaluable’ contribution to the debate by complaining that the Speaker had recently muttered under his breath about HER being a stupid woman (as if), and what was he going to do about it, to which he replied that he had addressed that matter weeks ago (and probably, not unreasonably, muttered under his breath about what an airhead she was).

Nothing, strangely, was made of the insults that Tories have hurled about the place in recent times. Most recently the other day when the deeply unpleasant Nicholas Soames suggested that Ian Blackford go back to Skye. (Jeez man, you have absolutely no idea how much we’d like it if he just could do that.)

Nicholas, the dear boy, has form on this, having previously been pulled up for barking like a dog at Tasmina Ahmed-Sheikh. He’s almost as charming as the Liddle Grainger chap who suggested that the Scottish National Party members could commit suicide and then moaned that they were w***ers when they complained.

And I’m no lip reader, but it is reckoned that Hammond used the same expression recently when a Labour MP was asking a question at PMQs, and our own dear Fluffy was caught on camera a while ago mouthing what looked like “silly bitch” (I think) to something that Yvette Cooper said.

Now couldn’t care less what they call each other. They are supposed to be grown-ups and they should be able to handle a bit of name calling. Indeed, for that matter, they can go outside and slap each other about if that’s what they have a mind to do and I still don’t really give a toss. The whole world is already choking itself laughing at the UK, so what difference will some rough and tumble and a few drunks falling in the Thames make? I mean, would anyone even notice?

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However, it’s as well to remember that this was Wednesday afternoon and like many other people in the UK, they were supposed to be at work.

It might be worth mentioning too that, although they may or may not have noticed it, there are a few pretty important things going on right now that they need to be dealing with, and spending time arguing like 6-year-olds in the playground, while we’re paying their wages is very definitely NOT ON.

It may be the end of term but no one told them they could bring games in.

THIS BLOKEY THINKS HE’S PART OF A RESPONSIBLE GOVERNMENT

So, let’s see if I got this right. They aren’t going to use the army, but they have 3,500 personnel on standby. Presumably for absolutely nothing? Good use of personnel, guys, and given that since you outsourced your recruitment to Crapita, you can’t get anyone to join, what are you going to do? Ask the Chelsea Pensioners?

The worlds biggest buyer of fridges for storing medicines?  They are storing drinking water (in fridges)?

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(We have plenty of that in Scotland! We can do a reasonable rate if you buy in bulk.)

But this roaster says …you’d expect any responsible government to do take these steps.

I tell you what I’d expect a responsible government to do, matey.

I’d expect them to have prepared for a no vote before the referendum. What kind of idiots would have failed to consider that they could lose? Oh yeah, the over-privileged Eton Boy, David Cameron. ‘Nuff said.

Having lost and not having done ANY preparatory work, I’d have expected them to NOT trigger Article 50 until they had a collegiate response to the situation, you know, something like a realistic plan, maybe that they could put forward to Europe.

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I’d have expected a responsible government to NOT have a General Election (breaking the fixed term parliament act) and then go on to lose their majority.

I’d have expected them NOT to bribe, of all parties, the bloody DUP, with £2 billion of OUR money to get them to keep the hapless prime minister’s incompetent backside in Downing Street. Lord knows, she was useless enough before she tied herself to that bunch of extremists with their blood red lines.

I’d certainly NOT have expected them to still be fighting like cats and dogs amongst themselves, never mind any of the opposition parties, and never mind the EU negotiators, with fewer than 100 days to go before we drop out by default, over the edge of a cliff.

I’d expect them not to take a Christmas holiday while this crisis was happening. If they have to sit in parliament on Christmas day, tough cookies.

No deal is better than a bad deal

I’d expect them not to wait until the middle of January to bring back the delayed proposals, (which were definitely going to be voted on last week, you’ll remember) to parliament, you know, once they’ve returned from skiing in Megève or sunbathing in the Maldives, and blackmailing their own MPs to either vote for them or crash out into oblivion.

I’d have expected a responsible government to have behaved like a responsible government. But I’d have expected it with realistically very little hope. They told us that no deal was better than a bad deal, and the bad deal they have negotiated is now better than no deal? Only in Toryland.

So it is a HUGE surprise to me that, far too late, they are facing up to the fact that they may be about to bankrupt us all, and split their party… and that they have started taking emergency power to themselves.

Although, frankly, the thought of morons like them having any kind of emergency powers and what they might do with them, scares the s**t out of me.

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Un saut dans le vide

It seems a bit obvious to me that what Mayhem is doing by refusing to hold any vote until halfway through January and by announcing that companies should prepare for no-deal Brexit, is her trying to scare politicians into voting for her half-arse crappy deal because, in the kind of turnabout we have come to expect from her, it seems that a bad deal IS in fact, better than no deal.

!!!!!!promises proises

Soooo, David, I guess you were forgetting about the utter chaos that Brexit has caused?

And Mickey, is this the path that we chose?

John, pa gardiau oedd yr oeddem yn eu dal? Jokers? Give us a rousing chorus of “Mae Hen Wlad Fy Nhadau”… oh no… I forgot… my bad.

Aye, DOCTOR Liam, so easy that you’ve managed to make an arse of it?

A better trade deal; that we have at the moment? Maybe you could explain how that works. Did you go to Hogwarts by the way?

Gerard, old thing? Did Tommy tell you that? You’ve been had. It was probably the tea that did it. Most Europeans prefer ‘un café’. PS, how’s the party membership going, by the way? Down to single figures yet?

!£$

Still, you may not be able to eat them, but they sure do look pretty, even when you’re very very hungry.

***********

Oh yeah, and how about this?