JUST FOR A LAUGH

https://www.politico.eu/interactive/boris-johnson-new-pm-uk-brexit-donald-trump-robert-mueller-us-cartoon/

Thanks to BJSAlba. Great selection this week.

joke egg

 

joke broken
GOTTA LOVE IT… BROKEN DOWN AND GOING BACKWARD!

Et juste pour rire…

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I say, you are hairy. I’m a kiwi, you idiot!

 

SOPPY SUNDAY

Image result for Orangutans
Morning all. We’re just checking to see if your SS ticket is valid…
n squ
And we’re just sleeping.
nfaroe is
Faroe Islands.
n rhino
Just some little mates round for a blether.
n razorbill
Razorbill here if you fancy a quick shave.
n reno nevada
Reno, Nevada.
n porcvh bear
Just putting my paws up for a while.
n alpie
Alpine meadow.
n baby deer
zzzzzzzzzzzzzz
n baby
Try and tell me that I’m not cute. It won’t work. I know I am. My mummy told me.
n badger
That awful Leadsome woman isn’t about, is she?
n catnip
Ooooops
n marbled white
Marbled White.
n mount robson Br Col
Mount Robson, British Columbia.
Image result for australian outback
Australian outback.
n my turn
Is it my turn yet?
Image result for capital of burkina
Ouagadougou.
ncorn snake
Corn Snake.
n turtle
Can’t you swim or something?
Image result for Orangutans
Well, doesn’t time go fast when you’re having fun? See you next Sunday.

 

 

 

 

LIE AS YOU MEAN TO GO ON

I suspect it wasn’t the only lie he told today.

THE NIGHT OF THE LONG KNIVES

!dAVID
AYE, WELL.
Among the many others to bite the dust this afternoon, is our own, little-loved, now EX governor-general. Apparently this despite advice of Ruth Davidson who had asked the new prime minister to spare him. Presumably, this is why he didn’t have the sense to resign while resigning was a possibility, like Rory and Hammond. He presumably thought, like Ruth, that she had influence. 
Scottish Conservative leader Ruth Davidson and Scottish Secretary David Mundell at an Edinburgh press conference thursday..Pic Gordon Terris/The Herald.16/3/17.
Awwwwwwwwwwww…
According to the Herald, Mr Johnson’s move threatens to deepen his rift with Scottish Tory leader, who had made it abundantly clear that she wanted Mr Mundell, 57, to remain in post.
So now we know what Boris thinks of the Colonel.
It also indicates to Munguin, that possibly Boris has his own man ready in place to put in the governor-general’s post.
He has rewarded others who campaigned for him during the contest, so why not for the position of Scottish Secretary.
Now, out of the Scottish MPs, who would be most likely to have impressed BoJo?
Related image
Oh yes, Ross “vodka goes better with Coke” Thomson.
Other sacked second-raters include: Failing Grayling (well, you can kinda understand that one), some people called Hind and Noakes of whom I’ve never heard.
Scarily, Dominic Rabb is Foreign Secretary and Preti Patel is Home Secretary.
Lower down the ladder, but equally capable of making a huge mess, is Andrea Leadsom at Business (can you imagine her organising companies to be ready in 99 days for a no-deal Brexit?)
Liz Truss is back in the cabinet too, taking over from DOCTOR Fox, who, as he has been in the past, was a complete joke as Trade Secretary.
Villiers is back, as Environment Secretary.
More will be revealed, I expect, as the night wears on. There’s an updating page here, if anyone is that interested.

A TALE OF TWO COUNTRIES

Today’s English/Welsh edition of the Sun.

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…and by contrast, the Scottish front page…

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So much for “our precious union” and “our UNITED kingdom”.

(PS: I see the English/Welsh Sun has already gone back to using Farenheight as we prepare to leave the EU. I wonder when the price of 55p will be rendered as 12/-.)

Thanks to Joe Pike for the pics!

Oh, and this is the Irish Times…

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SO, IT ACTUALLY HAPPENED

bor

Boris Johnson is Prime Minister

What to say?

Well, let’s start off with the president of the United States. It wouldn’t be surprising for a man in his position to congratulate a newly elected leader of an ally. Nicola Sturgeon has done so (see below). But Trump added: “He’ll be great”. Erm, no he won’t Donny.

Then there was Ruth, who has kept an incredibly low profile since she backed, very publicly. Sajid and Gove just before they crashed out

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Seemingly unmindful that her constituency and her country voted to stay in the EU, her priorities are to slap Nicola Sturgeon down and prevent Jeremy Corbyn getting into government in England.

Seemingly a no-deal Brexit is no longer any kind of priority for her. 

Ho-hum. Then there’s…

 

  • David Mundell
    @DavidMundellDCT

 

I congratulate Boris Johnson on his clear win in the leadership contest. Our party must now unite behind the new leader and Prime Minister, so we can get on with the job of delivering Brexit, whilst maintaining a strong United Kingdom.
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Mr Mundell has been vocal in the past, not only about how disastrous leaving the EU would be for the country of which he is some sort of governor-general, but also quite clearly stating on Twitter on several occasions that he could not work with Boris Johnson and would not serve under him.
David Mundell, December 2018: “Given my views about Mr Johnson which are well known, [serving in his cabinet] would be extremely difficult. “Mr Johnson and I don’t agree on a whole range of issues and I don’t see myself being able to serve in that way.”
As usual with Mundell, however, it appears to be a load of p*ss and wind, as there is absolutely no mention of his resignation in Mundell’s tweets today. At least so far.
But Ross Thomson has been Mr Johnson’s campaign manager in Scotland, and Ross is nothing if not ambitious.
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Maybe Fluffy won’t need to resign.
Adam Tomkins also chipped in with his twopenny worth of sycophancy. No priority for a sensible Brexit, never mind doing what the bulk of Scotland voted for and scrapping it. Oh no. The only thing the Tories seem to care about is maintaining their chance of a seat in the House of Lords

Adam Tomkins MSP
@ProfTomkins
Congratulations to

 His job now is to safegaurd (sic) the Union from the three people who, in their different ways, would destroy it: Sturgeon, Corbyn and Farage.

**********
Nicola had the good manners to congratulate him but went on to make it clear that she had priorities which, unlike the Tories’, included trying to protect Scotland from a catastrophic Brexit. Odd that!

Nicola Sturgeon
@NicolaSturgeon

1. Congratulations to Boris Johnson on his election as leader of the Conservative Party. Despite our many differences, I will do all I can to develop a way of working with him that respects and protects Scotland’s views and interests.
2. However, it would be hypocritical not to be frank about the profound concerns I have at the prospect of his premiership. I am certain that the vast majority of people of Scotland would not have chosen to hand the keys of No 10 to someone with his views and track record.
3. Most immediately I, the Scottish government and the SNP

will work with others to do everything we can to block his plan for a no-deal Brexit – which would do catastrophic harm to Scotland.
4. And I will continue to advance the preparations to give Scotland the right to choose our own future through independence, rather than having a future that we don’t want imposed on us by Boris Johnson and the Tories. That is now more important than ever.
Boris-Offensive-Cartoon
I suspect there will be much to say, some funny, and some tragic, over the next few weeks…  But let’s take a break now with a few words from someone who worked for him…

Laura Murray 

When I was 21 I worked for 2 years in the Mayor of London’s press office while the Mayor of London was Boris Johnson. He was incompetent, chaotic, lazy and genuinely seemed to not give a shit about anything at all. Possibly the worst type of person to be our Prime Minister.