However bad your day has been you are not the person trying to write Truss’s conference speech.
Said Mars when entangled with Venus:
‘I think there is something between us,
And the sound in my ears
Of Olympian jeers
Suggests that the blighters have seen us!’
**********
Fellow walks into a pub. The Daily Special is chalked on a blackboard. “A pie, a pint and a kind word of advice – £5.”
It’s a bargain. He orders the Daily Special. A pint of beer in one hand and a pie in the other, he asks the barman: “What’s the kind word?”
The barman:. “Wouldn’t eat that pie if I were you.”
***********
We’ve heard that a million monkeys at a million keyboards could produce the complete works of Shakespeare; now, thanks to the Internet, we know that is not true.
**********
22.
We had a power outage … my PC, laptop, TV, DVD, iPad and music system were shut down.
My phone battery was flat. I couldn’t recharge.
It was raining so I couldn’t play golf. I couldn’t make coffee.
No microwave so no popcorn.
So I talked with my wife for a few hours.
She seems a nice person.
24.
The only normal people are the ones you don’t know very well. – Joe Ancis
25.
Munguin thanks: AndiMac, John, Erik, Graham, Brenda and TM.
This is an afterthought that I saw from Hetty on Twitter tonight, explaining Trickle Down.
And I thought this was good too:
MUNGUIN'S NEW REPUBLIC 
Great selection.
Seems that miss truss has another new nickname, Revolver.
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🙂
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# 29: I like Trumpy’s 7,000 sq ft luxury apartment. No doubt he’ll continue his fundraising activities from there.
The Sunday Times reported that Liz “ordered” the King not to attend the COP27 climate change conference. But maybe it was just “advice.”
https://www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2022/oct/01/king-charles-abandons-plans-to-attend-cop27-following-liz-trusss-advice
#19: Perhaps there are Munguinites who never saw the original Carnac the Magnificent on American TV.
A part of the joke is the enthusiastic audience applause when the LAST envelope is announced, meaning the stupid jokes are about over:
Then there was the night when Carnac wasn’t given the answers to divine. Then it was all downhill from there:
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Advice in these matters, Danny, is an order. The monarch has no opinions (officially), although Char;lie has, to be fair to him, always been green.
“The Government feels, that your majesty should not attend” means “No. you’re not going”.
Presumably this is because the government in England is breaking every rule re climate change.
Nicola Sturgeon, however, cannot be ordered around by the likes of Truss and I understand that she is going.
For Britain, hosting COP was all about appearing to be important and pretty much nothing to do with saving the planet. You don’t make pots of money for your donors and yourself by saving the planet.
Carmac is about as funny as jaundice!!!! 🙂
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Very good….
Though with reversal of tax cuts for rich….now being reversed…and Dross insisting Scottish Govt mirror this policy….
Well as to Prince Andrew ‘The Loch Ness Noncer’………….
I think we have more chance of seeing NESSIE in Loch Ness than Dross in the coming days….especially via THE channel that brings you …allegedly…but not really…. ” The news where YOU are ” (as dictated by Pro UK political parties)………..
You couldn’t write or rather make up some of the clusterf*ck that is going down down down in Tory UK just now………….but the BBC Scotland will continue…to make it up as they go along…needs must etc etc
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Thinking of all the Tory voters who have already sold their homes and are moving to England 😂😂😂😂
It’s hilarious, isn’t it. Hopefully she’ll have to sack the Chancellor. I mean no one will now take anything he says seriously, if it will likely disappear in a puff of smoke the next week.
As long as we don’t see Airmiles again, I don’t care much.
However, the benefit cuts still go on, I’m told.
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Yes indeed Tris…..planning to sell up and move to England…..
Merryn Somerset Webb…..Roddy Dunlop QC….to name but TWO of THE usual suspects….
Not looking so clever now are they …..jumped the gun…again…never learn do they…and they are the ones that apparently would be part of the brain drain exodus from Scotland….mind you so did Dross and t’other Tory sycophants in Scotland……watch them row back on behalf of the Tory party…with excuses…and reasons….LOL
Mind you the BBC in Scotland was pushing the same line as to the supposed ” pressure on the SNP to duplicate tax cuts here in Scotland”………..I fear another angle on the Ferry story may be imminent by them to deflect attention and to try and spare their embarrassment at yet again pursuing the WRONG line…..rinse and repeat with them for sure……….
Funny how Brexit is not cushioning their UK from supposed ‘Global issues’……not even protecting the UK from UK issues mainly the huge issues with the Tory party whose policy it is……among OTHER damaging Tory policies……….
And yes they are STILL going to cut public service money…..so where is the £350 million pounds a week that we supposedly paid to the EU actually now going …if NOT going to where it was promised as in to the NHS….David Davis (former failed Brexit secretary) had an article at the weekend in the Torygraph about the failing NHS and how an insurance system would be better he said “An insurance-based system is the only way to save the NHS”…..and so it begins…one of the REAL reasons for Brexit……will be too late for those voters who said ” Take back control” to then see that all control in their lives has now been taken AWAY from them as will the services they and their families use…such as the NHS…….guess it is a case of be careful what you wish (vote) for…..as might prove you are voting for your own demise ( and unfortunately OURS too if we stay in their UKnotOK)…..
Truss ….so it appears this lady IS for turning….OFF that is. (also the BBC and t’other alternate media ……….or rather never turning ON….#FakeNews)…..word is where is the Baroness….normally she is on a TV channel near you to opine ….where is she indeed…..seems when the going gets tough (for Tories)…. the Tory chancers GO and hide….until safe to come out again….as in when tis #SNPBAD time….or #ScottishIndyBad time (usually always the case via media and Pro UK peeps)………………
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I do hope that Dunlop has already moved or committed to buying a house. Him, and a load of Tory MSPs who seemed not to understand that being an MP in a country kinda obliged you to live in it.
It has always been the wish of the far right in the Tory party to privatise the NHS and have a private insurance system. Now the far right is in charge. So I guess it will happen.
There’s nothing wrong with that, but it does put a large strain on companies to pay the insurance as part of the job package. It also means a different kind of heath service for your average shop worker, that from the shop owner.
I remember the story of Justin Webb who was North America Editor of the BBC. His son was born in the states and had some illness (can’t remember what).
Even on his salary, which was huge, the BBC couldn’t afford to pay the kind of insurance his son would have needed. Luckily for him, he was taken back to England and given a job in their London studio.
If he had been American with a job in an American broadcaster, what would have happened?
They don’t seem to realise that we have an insurance system. Quite apart from income tax, we pay National Insurance contributions.
If you privatise them, the same will happen to them as to everything else that was privatised.
It’s all about money and letting the service go to hell.
Water (in England), Electricity, Gas, Railways, Telecommunications, …
Can anyone show me a service in the UK that has been privatised that isn’t owned mainly abroad and run for profit only?
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The chancer says we have to listen to the people.
The miss truss says that Nicola has to be ignored, or maybe she’s going to ask Nicola to work with her to introduce the tax cut, Oh , that’s another revolution.
The mp philps says it wasn’t his idea, he’s No2 in the treasury.
The left hand and the right hand are running away, it wasn’t me that did it.
The fat has to be cut from the spending on public services.
Are you YES yet?
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I wonder where Douglas Ross and his finance spokeswoman, Liz Smith, are hiding.
What are they urging Nicola Sturgeon to do today? Cut taxes like they were urging her to do yesterday or not cut taxes like they appear to see as the way forward today.
How can Kwarteng stay in the job?
How Rishi must be choking himself laughing.
Still it was only £500 billion off the market and £65billion to support the pound.
Peanuts to global Britain.
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Any sensible person would keep quiet with this chancer government until things had settled.
Dross gets caught out too often, just tells us he is stupid along with the rest of the tory dross in Hollyrood.
The 4 jobs dross and we pay him well.
The chancer let slip the cuts required to fund the other tax cut.
Penny in the pound off, hundreds of pounds on.
Billions of pounds off to the Caymans.
Remember folks, in these markets, if somebody is making dosh, somebody is losing. The casino is operating with the house the winner.
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He and “Scottish” Liz, are good at jumping on whatever bandwagon London sets rolling.
After we don’t support Johnson and now we do support Johnson and now we don;t again, you’d have thought they would learn to bide their time before they slavish read the script sent to them by the boss.
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Game for a laugh?
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Excuse the sweary word in the last post.
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I shall unclutch my pearls, Marcia. I never ever ever use sweary words myself, because butter wouldn’t melt in my mouth, and my nickname at school was Pollyanna Goody Twoshoes.
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Aye, Ed… we all remember that!
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Oh mon Dieu… Imagine having to listen to that!
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What an awful noise!
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Just as good hearing the tories say it was a time bomb left by Broonie, it’s only taken them 12 years to find.
The idea that you can announce a piffling £2billion tax cut when the plan and it’s costs will be announced in 7 weeks.
Start with the answer, 42, and write the plan to suit.
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🙂
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Here’s the thing about the ‘surge’ in the polls for Labour.
People are NOT voting FOR Labour.
They are voting AGAINST the Tories.
As sure as night follows day…..if the Labour party do win the next GE then any Scot considering lending their vote to them in the next GE JUST to get the Tories OUT…should also remember this.
A Labour Government is not FOREVER…..
Think of the mess we have NOW thanks to the Tories and a possible newly elected Labour government deploying the same excuses Tories have used …..for NOT implementing what they promised in order to perhaps win the next GE……as in unable to implement all they promised they would …as the Tories have left such a mess so they must then focus on this and that and NOT what they promised in their manifesto, plus Global issues/problems, post Covid economy recovery etc etc…..plus Brexit and making it work will do the same to Labour as it has done to the Tories….bring down their leader……as you cannot make a Great Britain silk purse out of a Brexit Sow’s ear of a policy……
So if they win the next GE….all the Tories need to do is to reform with a more palatable NEW leader to the traditional and NEW Tory voters , highlight Labour’s failings and broken promises in order for them to win the subsequent GE.
Then Scotland is back in SAME place as before….with a Tory government it did NOT elect …..rinse and repeat for decades…..unless….we do you know what in Scotland.
Also current polling PROVES Labour do NOT need Scotland’s votes to WIN a GE…..they only need Scotland to vote for them to save THEIR Union…..but they DO need English votes via a majority to win a GE hence why much of what they say and do (and also endorsing much of what Tories say and do) is so closely aligned to Tory policies and thinking…especially but not uniquely just Brexit.
So if in Scotland voters do not vote for the Tory or Lib Dem parties via a majority then Labour votes increasing their votes and seats in Scotland will be for them (false) proof that Scotland does not support independence…
Which for THEM…contrary to what Sarwar says…is THE defining and ONLY issue in Scotland….
I think Now is the Time for Scots to say …”Won’t get fooled again”…..if not …they will then be saying ” Fool me once shame on you…fool me twice shame on ME”…..simples.
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Absolutely. Labour isn’t popular; it’s just that the Tories have become poison.
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Next pm, therese coffey.
I waited until lunchtime was over.
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Ummm… could you have waited till dinner was over?
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Pass the brain bleach, please, Tris. Quickly now!
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Yes indeed, NMRN.
It occurs to me that the Supreme Court decision on the legality / lawfulness of the Scottish Government’s legislating for a referendum is due out this month.
If the Supreme Court says that the SG can’t legislate without Westminster’s permission, we assume that the next general election will be a de facto referendum on independence.
Complication: even if the Supreme Court says yes we can have our referendum, Westminster notwithstanding, if the current Westminster clown car, sorry, Government falls before the referendum due date, bringing about an early general election, will that election be used as a de facto referendum?
Naturally, I think it should be. Except: if the result of that is negative, do we get another chance in an October referendum? If there’s an early election, we would have far too bloody long to wait for another general election if the result of the October referendum is negative too. May all the gods preserve us from another No of any kind – I don’t think I could bear it, or another minute of Tory rule.
Damn the State broadcaster and their people’s lying eyes. They and the other outlets of the Great British Meeja Machine cost us at least 10 percentage points for independence.
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Aye indeed eddjasfreeman….good comment.
Let’s also not forget Michael Gove on Andrew Marr show, when he Gove, was STILL a government minister stating that the UK Government would NOT go to court and make legal challenge “the UK government would not mount a legal challenge to any independence referendum the Scottish government would put in train” was what he said to Andrew Marr when asked if they would challenge the Scottish Govt in the courts re another Indy Ref …………so he stated they, UK Government , would not go to court to BLOCK another Indy referendum…YET they HAVE……quelle suprise.
The legal challenge was submitted by the UK government while Boris Johnson was still the PM and Gove was still a Government minister…..so no excuses to be had that we now have different leader and government………..
Never trust a Tory like EVER…………do they EVER tell the truth…..or is LIES their only constant policy linked to ALL they say and do as a political Pro UK party (rhetorical Q..obvs)………..mind you t’other Pro UK parties have form on lying too do they not…and the MSM…..can we file them all under parcel of rogues for a Nation ….as in on behalf of a fake one aka the UKnotOK.
Have a nice day eddjasfreeman (and everyone else on here)
🙂
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Aye but Gove is the bloke that, if you remember, held all the bloody cards… Clearly he dropped them before he could play them or he failed to learn the rules and though 6 was high..
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It’s because the EU cheated, Tris! They could see the reflection of all his cards in his glasses. Anyway, it’s a bad idea to announce that you hold all the cards in advance of your poker game – because everyone will know when you’re bluffing or cheating.
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I sometimes think that Gove should stick to discoing with his friends and leave cards to people with more capacity for it.
On the other hand, in fairness, it appears he led the revolt of Tory backbenchers against Truss’s plan.
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Oh well, a stopped clock is right twice a day.
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A rather better average than Gove.
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Hopefully someone is taking pieces from the Sky u-tube interview of Mr C Philp. No2 to the chancer avoiding direct questions on tax uturn.
I don’t accept the premise of your question.
The government needs to listen to democracy.
We are a government that listens to democracy.
The DWP secretary is responsible for UC uplift, the tax u-turn was a very small amount of the plan, £2 billion is a very small amount.
This is an mp that voted against £30million for school meals during holidays.
Thinking Burley has some accurate information ref the Philp input to the policy.
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The gmb team interviewed littlewood on the u turn.
Quote, in the big picture £2,000,000,000 is just a rounding error.
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I heard that he said that the plan wasn’t his idea. So the Chancellor and the PM worked it out themselves and didn’t consult other people.
Pffff….
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Especially liked #2 (Brian Cox – what about the ferries) as I was at Gerry Hassan’s event at the Wigtown Book Festival yesterday and someone yoon from the floor tried to equate the SG “Ferries scandal” (their words) with the Truss clusterf*ck in both scale and importance.
Hats off to Gerry for remaining professional in the face of such provocation but he made it very clear to all present that the two issues weren’t in the same league by a country mile
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LOL. A country marathon…
We also need to remember that the English government has overseen the purchase of shits that can’t move forward and fire weapons at the same time; of tanks that make the people in them sick; of ferries from a company making pizzas; PPE that was substandard and couldn’t be used from a wide variety of sources including the Duchess of Mayfair and Handcock’s pub landlord… and any other donors or mates they had; aircraft carriers that have spent their lives in dry dock; HS2 (how long does it take to lay the first rail?: Crossrail; London sewers… the list is endless.
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The city are predicting the inflation rate to be used for benefits and pensions from April will be 4%.
THe government are going to use the energy help to reduce the calculation.
So they are waiting until after the conference before telling you the good news about the improvement of inflation.
When lizzy says there will be efficiency savings there will be.
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Until she says there won;t be… of course.
Well, let’s look forward to a winter of discontent, because I doubt many people will tolerate that.
If inflation does drop, they have to remember (but they won’t) that there was a period of months where inflation was over 10%. These prices aren’t going down. Every ordinary person is worse off.
But if your motto is “let the bodies pile high”, I guess you welcome that.
The people who die of cold or hunger won’t be royals, aristos, MPs, donors or bankers. Just plebeians…
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I can only think that was why Philp wouldn’t discuss the triple lock on the media this morning.
It’s the DWP that decide.
The treasury just borrow the cash from the BoE to pay it.
Quote is full pension to rise by £379 annually from April and not the £1000+ the current rate would calculate out as.
They will tell you after the conference, lizzy needed her honeymoon blip, before they u-turned on tax.
The think tank say £2billion is just a rounding error in the big picture.
Del boy economics from the government, distractions required.
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Has anyone ever seen such an incompetent government or such a right wing one in the UK?
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Meals at 30 pence man.
Yes a 180 degree change of direction on the 45% rate.
Heard the georgie mayor say that work has to pay and that benefits are stopping people taking up the hundreds of jobs he knows are requiring filled in Newcastle.
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I think it is fair to say that there are a number of people who won’t work and won’t want.
People who claim benefits and work on the side.
In honesty I don;t think that there are many who claim benefits habitually, if they have no other income source.
If there are, this is the fault of local DWP staff, who aren’t doing their jobs properly…
I want Lee’s cook book for Christmas so that I can make sure that Munguin’s Christmas dinner costs no more than 30p.
So if you see it… let me know.
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That’s like calling driving up a tree an emergency stop, I think. Well, in the present case it might be better to call the change in direction an elastic collision with financial, economic, political and real-world reality. The Truss regime’s idiocy and incompetence have inflicted damage on the UK economy, already in a fragile, unstable state of disequilibrium, that will be felt for years to come, and continues dogmatically and callously to constantly aggravate it.
Here in Scotland it continues to be maddening to be obliged to carry out the edicts of such an unworthy regime at Westminster, or be subjected to them against our express democratic will. Put another way, that is to be strongarmed into making basic, obvious errors that we saw coming a mile off.
That said, the Westminster regime is so hated by its own troops in the Westminster parliament that it may fall before the due date of our referendum. There may then be such a feeding frenzy among the Tories that a general election may have to be called, though the odds are probaby against it still. In that case, then regardless of whether the Supreme Court decides that the Scottish Government may hold a referendum in October next year or not, that early general election should also be considered a plebiscite election.
We Scots are suffering because of the Westminster regime, and we’ve suffered under it for far too long. Too many of our compatriots were successfully deceived back in 2014. Damn the lying eyes of the Great British Meeja Machine, and pray for change.
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Yes, agreed.
When is the court ruling expected?
I doubt many Tories in Westminster will vote for a general election. For so many of them, it would mean that the gravy train would have crashed and they’d have to take jobs in the City, which would mean doing real work
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I feel the need to point out I told you all some days ago that Kwarteng would be first under the bus when his usefulness expired as he’s a coconut/oreo/house nigger to the establishment.
I think you disagreed Tris?
Never nice to say “told you so” but there we go, for once I’m saying it 🙂
Never EVER underestimate how racist England is.
You can’t possibly understand it unless you’ve lived here for the last few decades.
On a personal note Kwarteng deserves every second of his humiliation. He’s an odious excuse for a human being with no redeeming qualities whatsoever.
…and on an aside even McVile (McVey) considers it unacceptable to refuse to raise benefits by the rate of inflation.
We live in interesting times.
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Not to raise benefits (McVile).
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Oh and don’t assume the racists are all white. They’re not as recent events in Leicester reveal….
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It doesn’t matter to me what colour someone’s skin is. I’ll criticise anyone who goes after someone else because they are different. Same with religion. That’s one thing we do have here in abundance.
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I think you don’t understand how Hinduism works.
They basically despise EVERYONE who isn’t Hindu and of the same or superior caste.
This isn’t new but the BJP in India is exporting extremists in their millions now who will push this view.
The devout Hindu attitude was explained to me in the 1980s by one of the Ugandan “asian” refugees and its much worse these days. Much much worse. It was so bad that thousands of cops got diverted to Leicester during the royal funeral….
The idea that we’re going to have uncontrolled immigration in a trade deal with India – a county with over half a billion illiterate/innumerate citizens (out of 1.2 billion) is something which makes Christian sectarianism an utterly trivial problem. Really.
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I’ve a mate who’s Hindu. He isn’t even vaguely like that.
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Yes, you can’t judge all Hindus by the BIP, just like you can’t judge all Brazilians by Jair Bolsonaro, all Northern Irish protestants by the Paisley clan or Arlene Foster – or all Scots by Nicola Sturgeon and the SNP, or all English folk by Liz Truss and Kwasi Kwarteng.
Best to just take people as you find them. I have a problem with the concept of “untouchable”, though, in whatever form it may be found in whatever culture.
Over in the US, one of those awful MAGA-type Republican politicians, Ron de Santis of Florida, I think, delivered himself of the statement that nobody thought about slavery back in the day.
You can bet your bottom dollar that the slaves were thinking about it day and night. But of course, to the mind of a Ron de Santis and his ilk, black folk in America STILL don’t count, are still not worthy of consideration.
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Absolutely, Ed.
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Yes, Tris. Sectarianism is Scotland’s (and Norniron’s) preferred form of racism / tribalism. Funny how so many religious folk, so called, are so resistant to Matthew 22:39 (and Leviticus 19:18, Matthew 19:19, Romans 13:8, Romans 13:10, and Galatians 5:14).
I am particularly appreciative (even as a non-religious, humanistic type of guy) of Galatians 5:14 (let me use another translation than the King James): ‘For the whole law can be summed up in this one command: “Love your neighbour as yourself.”’
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Yeah, it’s odd how many “christians” never seem to have read any of their holy book… or maybe, like Jake, insist on reading it in Latin when they only know “Floreat Etona” and indeed translate that as “Eton Flowers”.
Of course, I blame God for not speaking English like proper people does!!!!
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An anecdote from the good old US of A.
The use of Spanish in public really gets the goat of some monolingual speakers of English, who occasionally try to pass legislation preventing it. They probably wouldn’t understand the concept of cultural imperialism, but hey, you can’t have everything! Just as so many nominally Christian people fail to act on Matthew 22:39, the monoglot English-speakers we’re talking about have a rather restrictive view of the First Amendment.
Well, this animus and prejudice against Spanish goes as far as preventing schools from giving Spanish-medium education, and from running Spanish classes for learners. It also drives them to try to shut down remedial instruction in literacy in Spanish for students who’ve never learned to read and write their own language. Speakers of Scots in Scotland will recognize the problem.
The quote I remember is that a certain Southern gentleman sitting on a school Board of Governors said “If English was good enough for Jesus, it’s good enough for me”.
We can be sure he meant Jesus, not Jesús.
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LOL.
Brilliant story.
I also love the story of a woman in California in a check-out queue in a store, speaking on her mobile phone.
The white man behind her tutted loudly and said “Speak English. If you want to speak Spanish, go back over the border”
She paused her call, looked at him and said “I was speaking (a native American language. I can’t remember which). If you want to speak English, go to England”.
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Tsk. My Latin teacher, a lovely old guy we called Ratty Joe (for his somewhat ferrety face and grumpy nature), would have likely aimed a blackboard eraser at me if I’d committed such a mistranslation.
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Indeed, Ed. You would have deserved it.
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Well, that’ll be me telt! 🙂
I would never disagree that he is useless. despite his Eton/Cambridge/Harvard education. I just can’t abide to see people being classified by the colour of their skin. I neither cut him slack because his skin is black nor do the opposite.
There is racism here too. Much less than in England though.
God, if that horrible woman thinks it is a step too far… that will be the next u-turn.
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Like I said he was never part of the establishment. Money only goes so far to gain you “entry”.
Nor is Truss, but she is a member of the “holy trinity” in terms of English politics – white, English, Christian (protestant) – in her favour so she’ll get the benefit of the doubt where Kwarteng won’t.
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Imagine someone like her describing themselves as Christain.
Just not seeing it.. Satanist more likely.
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As I said somewhere else just now, Tris, Matthew 22:39.
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Heart, soul and mind?
I can see the problem there right away!
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My favorite is Pic 14: ‘Phew! That’s the plays done at last. Now for the sonnets . . . ‘
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