RANDOM THOUGHTS

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Munguin was happy to welcome President Trump Biscuit for drinks (bring your own) at Munguin Towers.

I’ve no time for Sajid Javid, but he was the only senior cabinet minister who was denied an invitation to the multi-million-pound dinner for the extended Trump family at Buckingham Palace yesterday.

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I wonder why that was…

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It seems that, much to Mayhem’s embarrassment, the president of the US has indicated that the NHS is on the table for negotiations in a future trade deal.

Everything, indeed, is on the table. Now in fairness, I didn’t hear him say that he wants to privatise the NHS, just that it will be on the table.

Nicola Sturgeon has said that the Scottish NHS must never be on the table, but we all know that she could, at present, be overruled by someone as insignificant as David Mundell.

There’s a thought to worry you.

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Penny Mordant, who I am told is the defence secretary (it’s hard to keep up with the ever-changing UK cabinet as they keep on walking or being fired), wants to use the Army to deal with rising violent crime rates in England, which in itself is a rather frightening situation.

Perhaps if the government that she is a part of funded the police a little more generously then there would be less need to make use of the armed forces to keep the peace on English streets.

However, I noted at the same time that violent crime in Scotland is down by 33% over 10 years and I can’t help wondering if this is just a sneaky way of getting us Scots to subsidise the lack of English police.

On the matter of violent crime, I saw that Birmingham, England, now has a scheme (launched today)  to provide stab bags or bleed control kits to pubs and nightclubs in the city. These kits contain all you need to staunch the blood flow if one of your mates gets stabbed on a night out. The need for these bags has convinced me that I won’t be visiting any nighteries in Brun in the near future!

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What on earth is that orange thing with grandmama?
Jeez, Trumpy’s speech is boring and I’m stuck next to this loser. Must have a word with the servants. That ceiling needs painting. Will it never be time to go home?

A STATE VISIT FROM THE BLOKEY FROM THE WHITE HOUSE

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State dinner with President Obama.

I read that the queen (for which Maybot) has invited Donald Trump to make a state visit to the UK in June. That’s pretty short notice for the immense amount of preparation that will be required to keep him entertained and safe.

(Although to be fair, you could keep him entertained by giving him a bucket load of McDonalds and KFC, setting up Fox and Friends on his tv and allowing him free reign on Twitter.)

I’m a little dubious as to why this is happening.

When Trump made a visit back in 2018, there were mass protests and he was obliged to keep himself out of the way of ordinary people. He was helicoptered everywhere so that he could avoid facing the public.

There is no reason to suggest that it would be any different this time. Except that, on a state visit, he will be expected to go places and do things with members of the royal family and government (even if it’s raining).

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Talk about a face like a torn scone… Tubby pushes in front of the queen while inspecting the troops

A carriage ride down the Mall with royals is almost inevitable. And a big deal shite tie state dinner is normal. That means being close to the public. Crowds can only be controlled to a certain extent, no matter how many police the government is forced to deploy.

The royals may be less than happy to be involved with him.

The queen, of course, has no choice.

But Phil has retired from public duties. Charles is a conservationist and Trump and he are unlikely to make a happy pair. William and Kate have clear issues with him after he made sexist comments about Kate when she was snapped sunbathing nude a few years ago. Harry may have to be deployed, but his American wife will just have had a child… and Harry is pretty far down the pecking order for the so-called “leader of the free world”!

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I suppose they could drag her out and make her earn her massive income just for once. At least we’d all get a laugh at her hat.

Then there is the issue of whether or not he will be invited to address a joint session of the Lords and Commons as were Obama and DubYa.

Bercow is on record saying that he wouldn’t approve it, although refusing permission is not entirely in his remit. The Lord Speaker may be of a different view.

However, I’ve seen a few MPs making it clear that should he be invited to speak, they will be otherwise engaged.

Rude? Yes, but then rudeness and Trump kinda go together.

Maybe, of course, the Maybot has a solution to all these problems. But based on her current form, I reckon that she’d have problems sorting out what to eat for lunch.

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So happy together…

What I can’t understand is why she would add all that extra stress to her already stressful life and for what?

One last thought… I’ve not seen the proposed schedule, but I’m wondering if he will be moving outside England. Anyone know?

TRUMP…JEEEEZ

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It’s hard to find the right words to describe Trump…

I mean, he’s nasty, cheap, ridiculous. He’s dense, or at least seemingly unable to articulate deep thinking on any subject. Indeed even fairly shallow sentiment seems to be beyond his ability. He’s a vulgarian, and a proud sexual abuser as the “pussy” tape showed very clearly. (I’ll happily accept further suggestions!)

If he was the bloke in charge of your local supermarket he would be beyond the pale. As president go, he’s simply indescribable. Never has anything so ridiculous as his election happened.

If the American people wanted something different, they sure got something…erm, different.

I feel sorry for them. Personally, I thought that virtually everything he promised was pie in the sky… bringing back manufacturing jobs to the USA (to be done by people who expected salaries ten times and more than the current employees were getting with far higher conditions of employment), was never likely to be more than a dream. Muslim bans in a country with a constitutional requirement to accept religious freedom…silly. Walls across the southern border. Mad. Ridding America of affordable care. Horrific.

In any case, in his first year, he has achieved almost nothing except a few humiliations in the early days where his decrees were overturned by courts. Much of the rest of the time has been spent replacing members of his administration who walked, some after only days in post.

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I felt vaguely sorry for the Maybot today.

Vaguely.

Faced with Trump’s moronic retweeting of unverified hate messages from the utterly repugnant group ‘Britain First’, May was left with no alternative but to offer mild criticism of his actions. She would have preferred not to, but the demands from too many people in the UK were too great for her to ignore.

At the same time, of course, she is aware that she must keep in with him, because in the increasingly unlikely event that he is still president when Brexit occurs, she will desperately need his promised trade deal, no matter how injurious it is to the UK.

In this case, a bad deal will be better than no deal.

So given that he is a fractious, ill-tempered, childlike character, she doesn’t want to be seen to do other than flatter his ego and hope that he won’t be too demanding.  atrumpy

But of course, he doesn’t like being even mildly rebuked in the most polite and respectful way possible, so when she indicated in a statement that she thought he was wrong, he immediately, eschewing the normal channels of communication between governments,  tweeted a snarky comment back to her.

Unfortunately, despite spending about half his life playing on Twitter (the other half is spent on the golf course) he appears not to have got the hang of this tweeting lark and so he managed to send his message to another Theresa,  from Bognor Regis or somesuch place, who has 6 followers.

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And this is the man with a finger on the nuclear button!

Much has been made of the altercation today. Trump has been castigated by politicians from all major parties, and it has even been suggested that the invitation to a state visit should be withdrawn. That, of course, is almost impossible to do. Much though we might want it, that level of insult to a head of state of a nation that Britain desperately needs to keep in with, is a step or six too far.

Of course, the truth is that it should never have been issued within the first few weeks of his presidency. It never has been before, with presidents who were at least in some ways presidential. To issue an invitation to such a controversial figure within the first weeks of his incumbency was yet another of the Maybot’s idiotic misjedgements.

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Let’s hope that Trump is sentient enough to realise that even if the Queen has no option but to accept his presence here, the public is under no such obligation and that should he make the visit, the protests of ordinary people will be at a level designed to utterly humiliate him.  Hopefully that will be sufficient to persuade him to postpone his coming until his …erm…second term! Bwa, ha ha ha ha ha.

TAKE THAT, MAY

Who wouldn’t take Kate’s picture and make lots of money if she does the nude sunbathing thing. Come on Kate!

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Theresa May would have done well, as we may have mentioned before, to resist the temptation to dash to Washington before Donald Trump had found out where the bathroom was in the White House. Her undue haste showed her to be inexperienced and desperate by comparison with her more knowledgeable and mature counterparts across the world.
Inviting Trump to have a state visit in the first week of his presidency, given his reputation for faux pas was nothing short of moronic. It is normal for a state visit not to be arranged until some time, a least a couple of years, has passed.
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Trump has apparently made a list of conditions to his visit. Reportedly he wants to play a round of golf at Balmoral on the queen’s private course with her watching. Additionally, he has allegedly warned Prince Charles not to lecture him about green matters, unless he wants a fiery response. He wants to meet and have a photo opportunity with Kate and William and their children, just like Obama did.
But the above tweet, dating from 2012,  may have put the kybosh on that plan. The tweet related to photographs taken of Middleton sunbathing nude in the south of France that year when she and Willie were on yet another holiday
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“Kate Middleton is great – but she shouldn’t be sunbathing in the nude – only herself to blame,” he additionally tweeted. 
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Also, the petition to deny him the State visit, now probably the largest ever on the London government’s website, has topped 1.8 million signatures and today the Speaker of the House of Commons took the extraordinary step of making a statement in the House saying that he would not invite Trump to speak in parliament.  The state visit, he said, was a matter to be agreed “well above the pay grade of the Speaker” (although as he is the most senior commoner in England, I’m not sure that there IS anyone above his pay grade), but, speaking in parliament was something that was an honour, not a right, and it had to be earned. Normally an invitation to speak would be issued by both Speakers (Commons and Lords). Bercow’s statement was greeted with cheers from sections of the House, and clapping by the SNP, who this time were not told off. Denis Skinner rose to say “Well done”.
I can only imagine Mayhem is fuming. All that creeping just to be smacked down by Bercow. The whole thing is becoming a massive embarrassment.
I wonder if her rush to meet with two other deplorables, Erdogan and Netanyahu, will come back to bite her as swiftly. Hardly any wonder decent heads of government snubbed her in Malta.

MORE ABOUT TRUMP AND THE PETITION…

a-scottish-protestSorry to go on about the same subject two days in a row, but with reference to the petition, it seems that May has caved on her original dismissal of the proposal that the “state” part of the visit should be dropped and the affair be made a working visit between May and Trump. With nearing 1,750,000 (where only 100,000 are required for a debate) it has been agreed that there will, indeed, be a debate.

“Parliament will debate this petition on 20 February 2017.

Of course, there is no earthly way that the state visit would or could be downgraded. We all know that. No matter what p[oliticians say. A bit like Article 50 debate. The outcome is certain. The state visit will go ahead.

The invitation came from the queen (even if it didn’t) and for the queen to insult the head of state of the country that May desperately needs to court will simply never happen…even if one and three quarter million taxpayers (and rising) don’t want it to happen and don’t want the massive amount of cash that these things cost to be wasted on a billionaire nut job with an orange face.

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Certainly not while there are kids going to school with empty stomachs,  people being sent home from jobcentres, told they are fit to work and dying on the way home, folk dying on trolleys in A&E after waiting for 48 hours to see an exhausted doctor, and ex-military folk begging for food in food banks along with another million and a half citizens…sorry, subjects. Whatever, the state visit will happen. And they will load on the pomp and glittery stuff, because they know that the small minded, orange boyman with the fragile ego likes it, nay loves it. Give him goldy glittery stuff and he will give you a trade deal on his terms. You won’t like it (especially not the secret courts which will make the European courts look welcoming), but it will look like Tessy Mayhem hasn’t failed quite so badly.

But you can bet your life Trump knows about this petition, the demonstrations and the debate. He’ll probably be in denial, of course. The people out there were protesting FOR him, not against him and there have never been so many people protesting FOR anything in the history of the universe. Whatever fairytale boy. It’s bed time. Who knows if there will be repercussion for May.

 

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Looks just like the inside of Trump Tower.Funny in a way that we should support this. The original purpose of the petition was to save the queen and the Duke of Rothsay embarrassment. About that, we don’t give a fig.

Frankly, I doubt if the queen or her son will worry about that. They are perfectly at home with some of the most vicious detestable dictators in the world. They’ll probably find his lack of stiff upper lip manners rather distasteful, his brashness disconcerting and his hair laughable. I wonder if he slurps his soup. However, they are getting the best part of half a billion pounds from the state to do up one of their houses, so they can get over themselves and get on with it, with Charlie, biting his lip all the while on Green issues which Donald thinks are a Chinese plot to bring down the West. Whatever the big orange thing wants, Charlie. Just agree with him. Afterwards, you can scream.

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And all this was so avoidable…