AND THEY’RE OFF…

YOU CAN SMELL THEM FROM HERE

Munguin takes an irreverent look at the utter farce that is the Tory Party Leadership Race. 

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dom rabb
One of them is Dom and the other one was a talented man.

According to Craig Murray, it was Dominic Raab’s team that sneaked out news about the bin-raking House Elf and his cocaine sniffing ways. As he says: “Incredible that this process is choosing the UK’s next Prime Minister. It’s like watching rats fighting in a sewer – only the Tory battle stinks much worse”.

Indeed it does, Craig.

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tory rory
Rory, seriously… don’t, just don’t.

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Jeremy Hunt launching his campaign for the Tory leadership on Monday morning

Journalist: So, Mr Hunt, have you ever broken the law?

Hunt (grinning inanely): I wracking my brains, but, no, I think not.

Five hours later…

Hunt’s Spokesman:  Erm, see that thing earlier about breaking the law. Well, Jeremy was right, apart from last year when he breached anti-money laundering laws brought in while he was in the cabinet…

Oh well, his crime-free past was good while it lasted! Maybe he was on something when he forgot to declare all that stuff.

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Rank (and I do mean rank) outsider in the race, the terminally silly Esther McVey, was dealt a bit of a blow this morning.

And Victoria Derbyshire does a James Naughtie with Hunt’s name…

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Image result for boris johnson tax cuts youtube

 

And Boris has proved that he knows his target audience: the well-off elderly “Disgusted of Tunbridge Wells” types who are paid-up members of the Tory Party. To buy their votes, he’s promising a massive £10 billion a year tax cut to the better off, to be paid for by the Brexit Bonus (huh?) and an increase in National Insurance contributions on the less well off. Well, we can’t all be winners!

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And I’ve saved the best till last. The idiots’ idiot.

He seems to forget that for a little while at least (well, no one lasted long in that government), Dom was the Brexit secretary, responsible for getting himself and his “country” humiliated by the EU.

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BORIS TO STAND FOR PM JOB

BoJo has confirmed that he will stand in the election for the next leader of the Conservative and Unionist Pary, which I suppose makes him the first “serious”(sic/sick) contender. 

OK, OK, I know.

Image result for Boris johnson ridiculous
This is what passes for serious in the Tory Party today.

His name will go forward in addition to those of Esther McVey and Rory Stewart.

Considering their position, it is thought, are the following band of… erm, Conservatives:  Michael Gove, Amber Rudd, Sajid Javid, Dominic Raab, Jeremy Hunt, Penny Mordaunt, Andrea Leadsom and Liz Truss. (Maybe I should have listed the ones who are not standing.)

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We have the distinction of being blocked by the Leadsom on Twitter. We’re working on the others.

I suspect that most Munguinites don’t want any of them, but, unfortunately, in our present circumstances, whether we like it or not, one of them is going to be the next UK prime minister. So, with that in mind, who do you hope, the Conservatives elect?

Perhaps I should rephrase that and ask, which of these 4th raters do you think would be the least harmful to Scotland and the UK?

I suppose that given that the present incumbent is the Maybot, the bar is set pretty low for some sort of improvement.

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Little addition here for Juteman who was trying to identify my sweet smelling plant:

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
What d’ya think, Jutie?