Random Thoughts

We won, we won: let’s smash up an ambulance to celebrate.

London Ambulance would like a help to identify this dozy item who thought that the best way to celebrate England’s victory over Sweden was to trash a rapid response ambulance, taking it off the road and out of action. Unfortunately, she was not alone in her stupidity and criminal vandalism. Report her if you know her.


Image result for boris looking ridiculous short off
Boris giving what passes for deep thought as to how he can stuff Maybot

Mrs May managed to hold her fractious cabinet together on Friday night with a threat that anyone who voted against her could collect their redundancy money as they handed in their red boxes and chauffeured cars at the door. Not surprisingly, given that it is 41 miles back to London and the local taxi company has gone out of business, none of them did. And as Fluffy was clearing up the dirty dishes and heading for a night spent with Fairy Liquid, the rest of them rode back to London in their ministerial limos.

However, by Saturday, cracks were appearing in the coalition of crackpots, as Boris described  Mrs May’s plan as ” a turd”. (In my opinion that was rather praising it.)

So who, I hear you ask, is the new Foreign Secretary?


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Esther McWhatsit.

Talking about people who need sacking, Munguin demands that we give official mention to the odious character, Esther McVey, and her lies about the National Audit Office’s report into Universal Credit. It seems to me that she is either an out and out liar or incredibly incompetent. Or, more probably, both.

She didn’t mislead parliament, she lied to it. Why is she still a Cabinet minister?


Not a beauty pageant then?

It’s the marching season. The time when the Orange Order marches to celebrate a battle which took place in July 1690 (I’m indebted to Panda Paws and Andi for the correct date). Yep, they are THAT up to date. But then, they only go back 6,000 years to the beginning of the universe.

These marches are frequently disruptive and aggressive in nature because their whole purpose seems to be to rub their ancient victory in the faces of the Catholics (against whom they won in the Battle of the Boyne.

One such march in Glasgow yesterday passed St Alphonsus Roman Catholic Church on London Road in the Barras. It did so just as members of the congregation were leaving the church.  Canon Tom White was spat upon and lunged at by a man with a pole and other members of the congregation were insulted.

Now, I am against banning people from marching, no matter how futile and stupid their marches may seem to me. However, all marches should be lawful and people behaving like savages shouldn’t be excused because they reckon that are doing it in their god’s name.

If these people want to march and can’t control their more boisterous elements, they must be kept away from places where they may be provoked into violence. Clearly, that must include religious institutions of any kind other than their own.

Orange Order members turned out for the Twelfth of July celebrations
Jeez, that flag clashes horribly with orange waistcoats. ‘Taste o’ an ingin” as my Gran would have said.

When there was an independence march in Glasgow a few weeks ago, Ruth Davidson condemned it because it was disruptive to the life of the city… roads had to be closed, and there was the expense of policing the march (on which, there was no trouble at all).  She has been remarkably silent about the various Orange Marches that have taken place in the last few weeks, including the one with her boss, Arlene, the deputy prime minister, in attendance.

Image result for arlene at OO march in scotland

I wonder why that would be?

Of course, it is typical of the Tories in Scotland to rush out with a condemnation of anything, absolutely anything, that the SNP does, without for a second considering how it might come back and bite them on the backside (as the tablet story did this week).

And given the number of Ruth’s councillors who have been involved in racist behaviour (and in some cases sexual offences) this question of hers didn’t date well…

Probably slightly better than you do, matey.



Oh really!


What DID you expect?


Oh yeah, that was it…

Certainly are different, there’s no disputing that…


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When they go to live abroad, Brits like to fit in.



They get emotional about SOME babies, but not all.



The LOVE sport.



England Fans
And getting their kit off for a bit of stone-throwing at foreigners…



Although, fortunately, not all of them.



Like I say, they don’t like ALL children. Just ones with titles.



But, you have to give them credit. They have sticking power.



bre3 irlanbd
Even if they are incompetent.



And hopefully, it’s about to blow up in their nasty evil faces…


Just go, you unpleasant woman.



Random Thoughts

Apparently, Mrs May spent £20,000 on an RAF flight for Ms Foster from London to Belfast after their talks last week. The magic money tree must still have been bearing fruit at that time because there are cheap flights for as little as £14 from London to Belfast.


I know they are new besties, but seriously, as Arlene doesn’t actually have a job in Northern Ireland, what with her being the cause of the breakdown of the power-sharing government, it wouldn’t have hurt her to go to the airport and wait for RyanAir like the rest of the human race have to do.

Ruth must be incandescent. I bet, despite her being a colonel, May has never laid on military transport for her… and she HAS got a job….well, two actually.


I’ve always thought that Michael Gove was some sort of a cartoon character, not to be taken seriously, from his idiotic beginnings as Education Secretary, to his ridiculous position as Lord Chancellor.


On tv today he defended the tuition fees charged in England (the steepest in Europe) and said that people who didn’t go to university shouldn’t have to subsidise those who do. Mr Gove went to university in 1985. There were no tuition fees then.

Mr Gove went to university in 1985. There were no tuition fees then.


Most enlightened countries realise that it is to the benefit of everyone if we have an educated workforce. More and more jobs indeed require that people be educated to at least bachelor level. So in most of Europe governments make it as easy as possible for people to get to university. And most recognise that people’s ability to take up tertiary education should be based on their ability to learn, rather than their ability to pay.

Of course many people benefit from the education of doctors, lawyers, dentists, nurses, engineers, architects, teachers, etc. That seemed not to occur to Gove.


It’s a pity that Mrs May was “persuaded” by whoever to return Gove to the Cabinet. He may be an asset to Mr Murdoch inside the cabinet but he’s a bit of a liability to the rest of us.



Well, who would have believed it? And the car companies are mainly in the North East of England, which voted so decisively for Brexit.


So, if I had voted to put the country at a huge economic, cultural, education and social disadvantage because I was bent out of shape about us using the metric system and wanted my £ : s : d back along with Sts : lbs : oz and Gallons, quarts, pints and gills, not to mention furlongs, poles, yards, feet and inches, and all the rest, then I think I’d probably be ashamed to write to the papers about it. Oh, and I’m not entirely sure that someone who prefers a system based on the number 10, to a system, build around any number other than 10, could necessarily be called a fetishist.




Reminds me of the story of the supermarket queue in California where a woman was talking on her phone. A man behind her thought she was talking in Spanish and told her that she was in America, she should speak English. The woman explained that she was actually a native American, and she was talking Navajo, NOT Spanish. She politely suggested that if he wanted to speak English, he should go to England!

Incidentally, although I enjoy languages and always try to learn a little of the lingo of whatever country I’m going to visit, I’m not ever able to do much more than say hello, thank you, please, and a few other words. I’m pretty grateful then that no Hungarian launched an attack at me on a bus in Budapest for speaking English. Hungarian has to be the most complex language I’ve ever heard spoken.



It’s as well, when the Orange Order are marching anywhere near your house, to be prepared to clean up after them as you would with your dog.  A bucket of disinfectant and a brush will be nnecessary. They seem not to be potty trained.


This would seem to be a reasonable response to them, though.

I’m a great believer in freedom of speech and of freedom to assemble, but these people, quite apart from their lack of toilet training, shout racial abuse at Catholics and Irishmen alike.

I have to ask myself if we want this kind of racism and sectarianism on our streets.





What is hilarious is that the Tories had the effrontery to warn about a coalition of chaos?

Labour, Plaid, the Greens, SNP…

But in this comic opera world with “leaders” like Trump and Mayhem, Erdogan and Netanyahu, I’ve given up being surprised at anything.

Thank heavens for Macron, Merkel, Sturgeon and the Nordic leaders.


Thanks Andrew!



It has just crossed my mind that DUP with 10 MPs will be in Brexit negotiations but SNP with 35 won’t. Slow clap Scots.



As you may have noticed, I’ve never really been a fan of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland.
The events of the last few months have hardly served to make any fonder of the place.

John Major always refused to rely on DUP as he realised the consequences for Ireland. Tories today put their career before peace in Ireland.



First the UK voted to leave the EU. A mistake, in my opinion, and handled incredibly badly by the UK government, given the narrowness of the overall result and the massive variations between the constituent countries.
Part of that was a chronic quality of leadership up for offer and the terrible choice that the Tories made in “Strong and Stable”.

Says much about the London commentariat that they are now shocked at what appalling knuckle-draggers the DUP are, not having noticed before.



If there were a time to hold an election, it would have been when the Tories chose a new leader, and with her, a new direction. Certainly before the notification to the EU that Article 50 had been invoked and the ticking of the clock had commenced.
However, Strong and Stable kept telling us that she had no intention of calling an election… until, that is, we were on borrowed time.

Tory/ DUP? No deal better than a bad deal.



Then, assuming that the polls were correct and that she could get herself a whopping majority, she decided to shake the illusive ‘magic money tree’ and fund an election. (Cabinet Office minister Mark Harper estimated that the 2010 election cost the public purse £113,255,271. This was broken down to £28,655,271 for distributing candidates’ mailings and £84.6million for carrying out the vote.)

Sinn Fein says the Tories are breaching the Good Friday Agreement for favouring one side over the other, they’re playing with fire.



In common with everything else the woman does, it was a misjudgement. And in addition to wasting over a hundred million of our money, she put us through weeks of misery listening to her pathetic wailing, cost our political parties (that don’t have a magic money tree of off-shorers to donate), hundreds of thousands. And in the end, she lost her majority, made a fool of herself and her united kingdom, and delayed the start of the Brexit talks by a further 6 weeks.

Strange that she’s apparently so exercised about DUPs execrable LGBTI stance but was happy to defend the Rape Clause



It’s quite difficult to credit that one woman could be quite so incompetent and could have caused quite so much inconvenience to so many people. But she was and she has.

And now she has decided to compound it by teaming up with some neanderthal party from Northern Ireland, who won’t work on Sunday, believe that the whole of life is descended from Noah and his Mrs, consider gay people to be worse than paedophiles (remember Mrs Robinson), and have police check women’s homes to ensure that they haven’t bought any abortion pills over the net.


Just seen someone describe the DUP manifesto as “basically just the bible, with fortnightly bin collections” Too real


Never mind that it will put the Good Friday Agreement at risk by showing favouritism to the Protestant side over the Catholics. Never mind that it makes the EU talks much more complex. Never mind that it may even be illegal.

And will she go? No, she will not.

She says she’s here (to be laughed at?) for 5 years.

Of course, her party says the opposite. And she’ll be gone by the end of the summer.

And we may have to shake the money tree again for another £113 million.

Oh, what it is to be British and have all that money to waste on her vanity.