RANDOM THOUGHTS

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jake

So, if there is no Conservative Party left on November 1, why are they so keen to have a General Election in December?

I mean, if the Tories cease to exist, The Brexit party and Labour will carve up England between them (well OK, the LibDems may pick up a few seats too even if their leader sounds like she comes from South Africa! (I mean what IS that accent?)

Also, Boris Johnson, intellect and breadth… in one sentence? Surely not.

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cummings

Dominic, on the side of the downtrodden workers, swamped with nasty foreign regulations and court judgments and done out of employment by EU workers. Just as well we voted for him, eh?

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Well, Richard, what do you reckon? Will you call for these things to be devolved?

Then, if it went wrong, you could reasonably blame the Scottish government. As it is the shortcomings are firmly in the court of your beloved Tory UK. And honestly, even with the world’s second most chaotic government, Labout is still a country mile behind Boris “the ditch” Johnson.

For those on Twitter, give Sarah a follow. Great posts.

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alistqair union jack

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joke2

Ooooops! As Mr Grayson would have it… Shut that door!

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Now, I’m no apologist for Corbyn, but it’s a bit of a cheek that the Tory Daily Mail on Sunday highlights a bloke taking 40 winks on a L-O-N-G train journey from England to Scotland. Especially when their own snooze on the front benches while he should be listening to a debate.

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EHZfur6W4AAS7b0

I hear Gove has been ranting at Corbyn about how much money the Tories have spent on the NHS. However much it is, the English NHS is short of 10,000 doctors and over 40,000 nurses, so it’s not enough.

Ho Hum…Things go better with Coke?

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A REALLY BAD DEAL IS BETTER THAN A BAD DEAL

Also, anyone know how much bribe money is now on the table for Northern Ireland?

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Anyone care to hazard a guess that the Scottish Secretary, Union Jack, is fighting for the same sort of money for Scotland, which also voted to stay in the EU?

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Does anyone know what constituency in Northern Ireland this loonie represents?

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Ross Thomson MP
As a Unionist I’m pleased that the new deal @BorisJohnson has secured ensures that NI will be in the UK customs territory forever. The anti-democratic backstop has been abolished. Meaning that the people of NI will be in charge of the laws that they live by. #GetBrexitSorted

LET’S TITTER AT THE BRANCH OFFICES

According to Richard Leonard, Labour’s branch office in Scotland would scrap the ‘work car park tax’. You know, the one that isn’t a tax and isn’t imposed by the government, but is a form of devolution to local authorities of tax, which thay may choose to implement or not.

Yeah, that one.

In fact, the one that Labour actually very much likedd and was going to introduce in Glasgow.

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Until, that is, the Greens and the SNP agreed to give the councils the power to introduce the tax if they felt so inclined. The, of course, it became a BAAAAAD idea.

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Mr Leonard said: “Many people across Scotland simply cannot rely on our crumbling transport system because it is more interested in profits than passengers.

“The solution to this problem is not to slap a new tax on getting to work, it is to transform our transport system. That is why Scottish Labour will axe the tax in government, bring our railways into public ownership and build a free bus network to serve communities across the country.”

He might well have added: “Labour will borrow Mrs May’s Magic Money Tree and shake it for all they are worth. We will be seeking advice from Arlene on how to get out hands on it.”

Because, although all of these ideas are excellent, they are, at the same time, costly. Free bus travel, for example, is a superb idea already introduced in some Scandinavian countries. What Mr Leonard doesn’t say is how he will pay for it.

This railways stuff it interesting. Again, a great idea.

Railways in the UK were privatised by John Major.

As I recall, Labour came to power in the UK in 1997 on a promise to re-nationalise them. But, for some reason, it didn’t.

Nor did the Labour-led administrations in Scotland in the first two parliaments even attempt to have the power devolved so that they could do what their bosses in London had promised and failed to do. Eight years in power and not a request; not a sniff.

The SNP, on the other hand, are working on this.

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On the subject of the branch offices havers, I’m told that following Nicola’s pledge that she will request a Section 30 from the government shortly, Jackson Carlot has said that the Scottish Tories (branch office) will never agree to that.

Erm, I think you’ll find, Jack, mate, that no one was, for a split second, even vaguely thinking of asking you. Well, above your pay grade.

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OK, we should probably say something about the other wee branch office, I suppose, otherwise, they may feel belittled and left out… almost like they didn’t matter (snigger).

Um…

Let me see…

Hmmm…

Oh yeah, got it:

Willie Rennie is on holiday in Spain when he should be in parliament.

There! I knew he’d have done something of note.

THE TORY CONFERENCE IS GOING WELL…

Boris got a rousing welcome from Mancunians.

And the faithful were clearly agog to hear what drivel they were being fed.

torycon2

At some fringe meeting, Bojo was talking about a climate change summit he’s holding in Glasgow, if you please, where he wants there to be a big union flag at the back of the stage. And…

Well, I suspect she doesn’t want to be anywhere near your flag. But you do realise that being stupid enough to mention all that, does mean that Glasgow, very much a YES city will be teaming with Saltires, inside and outside of your summit. (Incidentally, does your boss… you know, your old bro with the orange skin… know that you are into climate change stuff???)

And in the meantime, they carried on sleeping.

TORY CONF

The “scandal” of Boris’s wandering hands won’t go away. I’m not one to comment on whether it is right to bring something like this up after years, or whether they should have dealt with it at the time.  He was their boss. It’s not always easy to deal with your boss in that kind of situation and unless you know all the circumstances it is best to stay out of it. But not dear old Tobe. He seems to have just gone and made it worse.

tory con1

Ho hum… And then there is the ever charmless Hopkins person:

hopkins

Has anyone ever come across a more stupid or repugnant character than Hopkins?

Ooops, maybe I spoke too soon.

I dunno. Can anyone point me in the direction of something sensible said by someone…anyone… at the Tory Conference?

I wonder if this is what passes for sense in today’s England.

Addition:

PIERS MORGAN FINDS FM A BIT HEAVIER GOING THAN POTUS

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He’ll need a few more smarts if he’s going to try to take on Nicola Sturgeon and win.

Oh and this…

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I keep on seeing good stuff… so this is another addition:

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And so is this…

WHAT A DAY!

parliament

And so it kicked off with some archaic language. That’s the British way.

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Then we were reminded of this:-

So, I suspect that we expect Mr Hancock’s resignation as Secretary of State for Health and Social Care in England. I wonder who will replace him.

Oh and these ones too!

Not to mention Rudd.

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The Scottish Conservatives were unable to find their leader who is usually so available to the press.

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Shy and retiring, Ruth hates publicity.

Her Office said that she would not be doing interviews today.

I suppose that they thought that her usual “SNP Bad” speel was a bit feeble, so they put up the absent-minded professor. I say absent-minded because, when he was a law professor he railed against the use of the royal prerogative as an abusive form of arbitrary power. Using it to shut down parliament is surely the most abusive thing you can do with it. He seems to have forgotten all that.

Still, he’s a Tory…what did you expect?

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UPDATE

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While I was writing this, Ruth Davidson appears to be on the verge of resigning as branch leader, citing pressures of motherhood and being at odds with Johnson.

Respect where it is due. Although, maybe there’s a lesson in THIS somewhere…

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Nicola had that to say. It’s no exaggeration nor is it hyperbole.

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ORDERS APPROVED AT THE PRIVY COUNCIL HELD BY THE
QUEEN AT BALMORAL ON 28TH AUGUST 2019

COUNSELLORS PRESENT

The Rt Hon Jacob Rees-Mogg (Lord President)
The Rt Hon Baroness Evans of Bowes Park
The Rt Hon Mark Spencer

Privy Counsellors

Two Orders appointing The Lord Ashton of Hyde and James
Cleverly TD MP Members of Her Majesty’s Most ?Honourable?
Privy Council.

Prorogation Order proroguing Parliament no earlier than Monday 9th
September and no later than Thursday 12th September 2019 to
Monday 14th October 2019, and directing the Lord High
Chancellor of Great Britain to prepare a Commission accordingly.

Question. Why is James Cleverly being made a Privy Councilor? Only last week he was involved in an accident while using his mobile phone! That’s a criminal offence, isn’t it? Honourable? …Not a lot!

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Suggestions are that this may make the queen rather unpopular, which is unjust as she really had no option but to agree to what her government and the privy councillors advised.

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So, is it time that Harry and Miss Marple had another kid for us to support.

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I’m sure more interesting stuff will emerge as the day continues… Feel free to update in the replies!

 

NOT HIS SMARTEST EVER TWEET

ach

Mr Cole-Hamilton tweeted this out presumably in an effort to demoralise the SNP canvassers and support who are working so hard for a victory in what is a very strong Liberal Democrat seat left vacant because ex-leader Tavish Scott got a better job offer.

Chris Jones tweeted in reply:

What an awful smear. I’ve been driving the @YSINational  around the island – their energy and enthusiasm has been a joy to work with. Hang your head in shame @agcolehamilton  for talking down young political activists.

PS we were North of Brae yesterday… 

For heaven’s sake Cole-Hamilton, you really are a beginner at this kind of thing, aren’t you?

If you’re going to tell a lie on social media, lesson number one, its probably best to get at least some of the facts right, enough to make your lie plausible. Otherwise, you just look like a dick! And guess what you look like?

Yep, You got it!

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Some of the SNP canvassers.

Good luck to Tom Wills on Thursday. It’s a HUGE ask, to take a seat in the northern islands, but you’re doing a hell of a job from all I read.

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With a bit of help…

A posh boy plan that has gone horribly wrong!

WHY, OH WHY, DID NO ONE THINK OF THIS BEFORE THE REFERENDUM?

I suppose the answer is that David Cameron promised an EU referendum in order to dissuade members of the Conservative Party, MPs and voters alike, from switching to UKIP.

His argument, as I recall, was that if people voted UKIP the likelihood was that they would get but a few MPs, who would be in opposition and who would have no power to offer a referendum. MPs crossing the floor might or might not be re-elected. (In the event only one of the floor crossers was reelected and he subsequently left UKIP and sat as an independent MP.) 

However, if people voted Conservative, he, their prime minister, would call a referendum on Britain’s (and Gibraltar’s) future in the European Union.

Of course, Cameron didn’t believe for a second that he would have to actually call a referendum. When he was making these promises, the polls showed very clearly, that a Labour win was on the cards.

And even, had Labour not won, for the Conservatives to form another government they would have needed a coalition with the Lib Dems, and Cameron knew that Nick Clegg would make coalition dependent upon there being no referendum. (Clegg subsequently lost his seat in the 2017 election called by Theresa May to boost her majority, which left her in minority government, dependent for her existence on a hastily arranged, ill-advised and very expensive confidence and supply arrangement with a party from Northen Ireland. A party which back Brexit, against the will of the Northern Irish people.) 

Smug, and satisfied as ever, Cameron thought he had it all in the palm of his hands.

Then disaster.

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No one had reckoned what a chaotic, useless and ultimately disastrous campaign Ed Miliband would run. He started off looking like little could stop him from becoming the next prime minister and ended up resigning and returning to the backbenches.

But Cameron, in a way, had also lost. He was left with little alternative but to call a referendum.

Still, the Eton boy, Oxford and Bullingdon culture pertained. He would win. Nothing would stop him. (And when Nicola Sturgeon reminded him that he might lose, he told her not to be silly.)

So, then he lost, and although he had previously promised to stay on and sort out the consequences of his referendum, he resigned as prime minister, and although he had further promised to stay on and serve his constituents, he resigned his seat in parliament, and took to a seriously expensive shed (£25,000) at the bottom of the garden to write his memoirs. (Apologies to Jacob for the comma before “and”.)

Being so sure of himself, as is his way, Cameron had failed to think about the consequences of his original plan and consider that it might, just might, go wrong.

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And so today, having gone through 3 years of chaos with Theresa May dithering, holding an unnecessary election, losing cabinet members, signing an agreement with the EU, which was then rejected three times in parliament, and finally resigning to be replaced with something even worse… we are facing a hard Brexit, where there will likely be massive job losses, losses of rights, rising prices, falling standards, chaos and possibly riots. And, although it probably won’t initially affect the mainland, a possible return to civil war in Ireland.

Ironic, isn’t it, that this whole project was designed to keep the Tory Party together.

A thick posh boy plan gone horribly wrong.

The Tory party is split like never before, indeed some Tory MPs have crossed the floor and some are threatening to bring down the Tory government. A Tory ex-Prime Minister is threatening to take the government to court. Labour is split, and has lost MPs, and is utterly unfit for purpose. UKIP has split and largely been replaced by a party which has no policies except getting the UK out of Europe. The UK is split by countries and may end up dissolved. And Ireland is facing civil war.

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Bravo, Dave, you wanted your legacy to be the “Big Society” (whatever happened to that?) and now it will be the probably break up of your precious union and of your party.

You complete and utter roasted posh boy wally!

LIE AS YOU MEAN TO GO ON

I suspect it wasn’t the only lie he told today.

SO, IT ACTUALLY HAPPENED

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Boris Johnson is Prime Minister

What to say?

Well, let’s start off with the president of the United States. It wouldn’t be surprising for a man in his position to congratulate a newly elected leader of an ally. Nicola Sturgeon has done so (see below). But Trump added: “He’ll be great”. Erm, no he won’t Donny.

Then there was Ruth, who has kept an incredibly low profile since she backed, very publicly. Sajid and Gove just before they crashed out

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Seemingly unmindful that her constituency and her country voted to stay in the EU, her priorities are to slap Nicola Sturgeon down and prevent Jeremy Corbyn getting into government in England.

Seemingly a no-deal Brexit is no longer any kind of priority for her. 

Ho-hum. Then there’s…

 

  • David Mundell
    @DavidMundellDCT

 

I congratulate Boris Johnson on his clear win in the leadership contest. Our party must now unite behind the new leader and Prime Minister, so we can get on with the job of delivering Brexit, whilst maintaining a strong United Kingdom.
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Mr Mundell has been vocal in the past, not only about how disastrous leaving the EU would be for the country of which he is some sort of governor-general, but also quite clearly stating on Twitter on several occasions that he could not work with Boris Johnson and would not serve under him.
David Mundell, December 2018: “Given my views about Mr Johnson which are well known, [serving in his cabinet] would be extremely difficult. “Mr Johnson and I don’t agree on a whole range of issues and I don’t see myself being able to serve in that way.”
As usual with Mundell, however, it appears to be a load of p*ss and wind, as there is absolutely no mention of his resignation in Mundell’s tweets today. At least so far.
But Ross Thomson has been Mr Johnson’s campaign manager in Scotland, and Ross is nothing if not ambitious.
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Maybe Fluffy won’t need to resign.
Adam Tomkins also chipped in with his twopenny worth of sycophancy. No priority for a sensible Brexit, never mind doing what the bulk of Scotland voted for and scrapping it. Oh no. The only thing the Tories seem to care about is maintaining their chance of a seat in the House of Lords

Adam Tomkins MSP
@ProfTomkins
Congratulations to

 His job now is to safegaurd (sic) the Union from the three people who, in their different ways, would destroy it: Sturgeon, Corbyn and Farage.

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Nicola had the good manners to congratulate him but went on to make it clear that she had priorities which, unlike the Tories’, included trying to protect Scotland from a catastrophic Brexit. Odd that!

Nicola Sturgeon
@NicolaSturgeon

1. Congratulations to Boris Johnson on his election as leader of the Conservative Party. Despite our many differences, I will do all I can to develop a way of working with him that respects and protects Scotland’s views and interests.
2. However, it would be hypocritical not to be frank about the profound concerns I have at the prospect of his premiership. I am certain that the vast majority of people of Scotland would not have chosen to hand the keys of No 10 to someone with his views and track record.
3. Most immediately I, the Scottish government and the SNP

will work with others to do everything we can to block his plan for a no-deal Brexit – which would do catastrophic harm to Scotland.
4. And I will continue to advance the preparations to give Scotland the right to choose our own future through independence, rather than having a future that we don’t want imposed on us by Boris Johnson and the Tories. That is now more important than ever.
Boris-Offensive-Cartoon
I suspect there will be much to say, some funny, and some tragic, over the next few weeks…  But let’s take a break now with a few words from someone who worked for him…

Laura Murray 

When I was 21 I worked for 2 years in the Mayor of London’s press office while the Mayor of London was Boris Johnson. He was incompetent, chaotic, lazy and genuinely seemed to not give a shit about anything at all. Possibly the worst type of person to be our Prime Minister.