I SAY CHAPS: SHOULDERS TO THE WHEEL IN A BRITISH KIND OF WAY

MUNGUIN WANTS TO KNOW, WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR. HIS ROYAL HIGHNESS HAS CALLED UPON HIS LOYAL NEARLY SUBJECTS TO RISE TO THE CAUSE.

Munguin, obviously, will have to decline because of a pre-existing medical condition known as lazy bones syndrome.

I’m surprised that Charlie didn’t immediately volunteer his brother, Airmiles, who, as we know, is incapable of sweating and should be able to work all day without getting a single sweat stain on his golfing gear. Added to which he’s no longer a member of the active royal family and has, in fact, become an even bigger waste of space than before.

And joining his uncle at the front will surely be Charlie’s son, the future king of England… (y’know, the one that hasn’t done a bunk to the USA). Yes wee Wills will be at it from morn’ till dusk, because he has always had a reputation as a hmmmm… hard worker…well, he’s always had a reputation anyway.

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Added to that, and to give us all something to look forward to, his nieces, the pantomime sisters will delight us daily by choosing a different hat to wear while they pick fruit in their fashion stilettos.

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If Whatsername wears the middle one, it can double as a loo seat… Things are not always what royalty is used to in the middle of a cabbage field.

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Apart from royals, who obviously have a duty to the country, and a really well paid one at that, I think that this cropping should be reserved for all those who voted to get Brexit done. You wanted to take back control of your potato fields and your strawberries.

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Get picking lads and lasses… and bonne chance. Erm, I mean spiffing show chaps

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Just a wee laugh I couldn’t help sharing with you (as I promised to add something light-hearted to every post during these hard times):

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I’m going with Nancy Pelosi on this one… he is morbidly obese!

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I know I’m on holiday, but I was looking at Twitter and I saw his royal highness giving it “let’s all pull together in the good old British way” talk in a shirt and tie and a jacket that cost more than my house… and I thought, sod this holiday lark.

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REJOICE, SCOTLAND

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Edward trying to out-posh Mr Rees Mogg.

For unto us another royal earl has been given.

And his name shall be HRH Prince Edward, Earl of Forfar (but only when he’s in Scotland).

Be grateful, ye common herd.

Yes, most of us get a small gift, a card and maybe a special meal at that time of year when we suddenly, and inexplicably, get older.

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Civies.

But what do you give the son who has everything?

I mean, you wouldn’t be buying him trinkets for around the stately home or a year’s subscription of Readers’ Digest, would you? He’s already a Viscount and an Earl and is promised the title Duke Of Edinburgh when his father and mother die. And for someone who only spent a few months in the armed services he has more military uniforms than you can shake a stick at.

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And all these medals.

Still, the Queen isn’t that imaginative when it comes to these things, so she threw him a title, a Scottish one, lest we should feel left out and unwanted in the UK. As if?

And so, the people of Forfar wake up today with a brand spanking new Earl.

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In other royal news, there is speculation that Kate Middleton is pregnant again. And that one of Andrew’s royal princesses is also supposed to be with child. So another couple of mouths to feed.

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Classy background.

Soon there will be more royals than common people about the place. Stop it already. There are only so many things that need opening… and we already have devices to do that for us.

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Replace the royals with these? Much cheaper.

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RANDOM THOUGHTS

Hard to take this in. But apparently, it’s not that unusual on the streets of London, where, according to Mike Dailly’s Tweet, a homeless person dies on average every couple of weeks. This, as the post says, in supposedly one of the richest and most advanced cities in the world.

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Much has been made of the fact that in October one of Andrew Saxe-Coburg Gotha’s daughters is getting married. She is styled and titled Her Royal Highness, Princess Eugenie of York. She is apparently 9th in line to the throne and has absolutely not the remotest chance of getting it. She does no public duties at all. She does, however, go on a LOT of holidays. It is her claim to fame.

However, she has decided that she wants an open carriage procession through Windsor, just like her cousin Harry (5th in line) got.

As far as I’m concerned she can have open carriage processions through Bratislava, Nuuk, Blaenau Ffestiniog and Oymyakon (Siberia) if she wants. Just the same as anyone else can if they have the money. The trouble is that this princess and her pushy father, Airmiles Andy, the Fat Old Duke of York, wants us to pay for all the security that will involve, at a cost of around £2 million.

I have no idea how much the royal family is worth but I bet that they can afford to pay for this nonsense themselves, and when people are dying of poverty on the streets of London, I find it offensive that the government is prepared to spend that much money on some spoiled posh girl whose claim to fame is going on holiday.

The usual, “oh, but think of the money that it will bring in in tourism in London” won’t wash with this one. I doubt if many people have even heard of her and I shouldn’t think that most people are in the least interested in her nuptials.

What do you think?

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I doubt many people would argue that Theresa May is the worst Prime Minister in living memory… and probably a good deal before.

She’s a dithering, wobbly, weak, croaky, cartoon character, who has no control of her party or of her MPs or of her orange-coloured bedfellows in the DUP.

She’s at odds with everyone, here, in Europe and in the USA.

She is utterly USELESS. My granny’s cat could do a better job and he’s dead.

And yet, despite all that, Corbyn comes in a poor second to her in a Yougov poll for the best person to be prime minister. It’s interesting that the most popular vote was NEITHER of them.

And just when we needed leadership more than we have needed it for 70 years.

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!cartoon1
Thanks for BJSAlba for this one.
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It’s disappointing to see a second EU referendum being sold as a “democratic right”. If these groups care about democracy they’ll listen to the voice of the people, clearly expressed in 2016- to leave the EU!

Stephen Kerr is Conservative MP for Stirling, in Scotland.

Scotland voted 62% -38% to remain in the EU. Stirling voted 67%- 33%.

That’s two-thirds of his constituents.

Still, the English and Welsh voted to leave so … sod the people of Stirling.

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Mr Kerr’s other claim to fame is, as a high-ranking member of the Mormon Church, yes, I know we’re not supposed to call it that any more, he outed gay members. The Mormons are homophobic, it seems, except, of course, when they use a gay person to get elected to a high paid job.

I hope Stirling remembers that when the next election comes along.

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!apension

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