IF ONLY MAYHEM THE MAYBOT HAD LISTENED TO DONNY THE DIPSTICK

We might have had a deal like he’s managed with China or North Korea…

Image result for tHE ART OF THE DEAL

After all, he did “write” a book called “The Art of the Deal”, didn’t he?

[Note from Munguin: Well, no. He didn’t. According to Chapter 2 of “Fire and Fury” (Michael Wolff, 2018) the author claims that Trump’s co-author, Tony Schwartz said that Trump hardly wrote any of the book and it is doubtful if he’s even read it all!]

Seriously though, Trump wouldn’t have been out of place in the cast list of the Whitehall Farce that is Brexit, along with the other main cartoon characters:

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The porcine posh boy; the posh but tasteless haystack who never grew up; the vicar’s cornfield destroying daughter; the disgraced DOCTOR; the lazy tosser; the flocconaucinihilphilicating faux aristo; the drunken ashtray … and the orange knob.

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What a team!

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JUST WHEN YOU THOUGHT IT COULDN’T GET ANY STUPIDER …

THE “MEANINGFUL” (TITTER) VOTE WILL GO AHEAD…EXCEPT, AS USUAL, WITH HER, IT PROBABLY WON’T, BUT IT MIGHT HAVE TO…

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Would be pure 100% classic May to delay the vote. She has spent the last two years kicking away problems so they can kill her another day.

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I had been going to write about the appalling business of Jackson Carlaw’s lies about the Scottish Health Service’s record on ‘flu injections in comparison with their English counterpart’s record. He did this by comparing the English figures with Scottish figures from the month before.

Needless to say, an investigation showed that Scotland had done a better job than England. It will be interesting to see if he apologises from misleading parliament as the First Minister has requested.

However, these events have been overtaken by the by now regular occurrence of Mrs May, at least apparently, going back on something that she had absolutely been very clear, not to mention strong and stable about.

This from the BBC.

Theresa May is to make a statement to MPs at 15:30 GMT amid reports Tuesday’s vote on her Brexit deal is being delayed.

That will be followed by a statement from Commons leader Andrea Leadsom – and then a statement from the Brexit secretary on Article 50.

Two cabinet sources have told the BBC’s Laura Kuenssberg Tuesday’s planned Brexit vote will be delayed.

There is not yet any official confirmation of the move.

Downing Street had been insisting the vote would go ahead, despite Mrs May being widely expected to lose it.

But a third Cabinet source has told the BBC the vote is “definitely off”.

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She apparently intends to give a statement to the House of Commons at 3.30.  

Promises, like piecrusts, in Mrs May’s book, are made to be broken.

But, and here it gets even dafter, it may be that she won’t be able to postpone the “meaningful” vote as a Tory (yes TORY) MP points out.

The PM does not get to pull a vote. The House will have to vote to pull a vote. I will oppose. We need to see this deal off once and for all.

 

So, stay tuned.

Sometimes she even beats Trump in the bizarre.

How the world must laugh.

RANDOM THOUGHTS

Economist
Politico
De Volkskrant, The Netherlands.
De Volkskrant, The Netherlands.
Caglecartoons.com, The Netherlands.
The Columbus Dispatch, U.S.
The Minneapolis Star-Tribune, U.S.
PoliticalCartoons.com, U.S.

Thank you to BJSAlba for these cartoons.

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You’ll have heard, no doubt, that Trump, having complained about the forest fires in California being the fault of poor management of the forests, rather than the very warm dry weather and very high winds, eventually visited the state. Hopefully, he paid respect to the many people who are either dead or missing. But concentrating on other people, dead or alive, is not a strong suit for him.

Image result for paradise CA

He went to Paradise to see the devastation caused by the fires, and when rambling later to camera insisted that it was called Pleasure. It wasn’t even a slip of the tongue. He mentioned it twice.

He then went on to tell anyone who would listen, that he had talked to the Finnish President and he had told Trump that they didn’t have many forest fires because they raked the forests in Finland.

Needless to say, Finns have taken to Twitter in large numbers, showing pictures of them raking furiously. And wise crackers, seeing him in burnt out woodland, tweeted “Forest meets Gump”, and “Make America Rake Again”.

It is, I suppose, some sort of relief for the UK, that while May and her half-witted government make fools of themselves in Europe, Trump is taking the limelight for idiocy on the world stage.

 

 

BUT SURELY THERE ARE LIMITS TO THE SACRIFICES EVEN THE BRAVEST OF PRESIDENTS WILL MAKE…

!!!!T
Oh, what a brave president you are. How safe we feel knowing you’re ready to do whatever it takes…
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… although, there are limits to sacrifice. It might be a bit damp, and French rain plays havoc with carefully arranged hair and pancake makeup… After all, you were only going to honour troops who managed to avoid bone spurs. So not worth messing your hair for…

Credit for this to James Felton

HOW TO WIN FRIENDS…

Trump doesn’t like the Press. Some of them ask hard questions.

He’s happier at a rally doing his act with adoring fans standing behind him cheering and chanting, whatever he’s just said.

But, even for him, this post-election Press conference really went off the rails.

The White House Press Secretary has shared a doctored video to justify banning a journalist from asking Trump questions…

 

A LIGHTHEARTED LOOK AT A LIVING, BREATHING LEG END

How does that work again?

trump9
Made in Eastasia.
trump0
I’d happily chip in, Mexico…
trumptory
Ruth showing how fit she is for high office.
trumpletter
A teacher got hold of one of his letters and corrected it for him.

 

trumpmerk
Just make him go away, PLEASE.

HOW TO GET ON IN POLITICS IN MONTANA?

At least, according to the Orange President…

Beautiful it may be, but if people there are impressed by body slamming thugs for politicians, then Montana’s probably not the kind of place Munguin would feel at home.

MAY CAME TO SCOTLAND TODAY…

…TO BE FAIR, SHE SEEMS TO HAVE BEEN MARGINALLY MORE POPULAR THAN TRUMP

Well, lady, you’ve treated us like shi*te.

What on earth did you expect?

Thanks to Hannah Jane for posting this on Twitter.

WHAT UTTER EMBARRASSMENTS

She might as well have said: “You know what, Yvette, I’ve not got a freakin clue where they will pay their taxes. Indeed, I expect they probably won’t”. Because she doesn’t know anything about it, and compared with Yvette Cooper who was patiently calm and polite but firm, May looked like a rank amateur.

Talking of which… Is there a competition going on between May and Trump to see who can be the bigger embarrassing roaster?

What a load of nonsense. He couldn’t even read the statement that his people prepared for him. He rambles through it, mixes up repeal and repel and indicates that there might be some doubt as to what he said… when there is no doubt at all.

Danny sent me this article from the Washington Post.

America’s child president had a play date with a KGB alumnus, who surely enjoyed providing daycare. It was a useful, because illuminating, event: Now we shall see how many Republicans retain a capacity for embarrassment.

Jeane Kirkpatrick, a Democrat closely associated with such Democratic national security stalwarts as former senator Henry Jackson and former senator and former vice president Hubert Humphrey, was President Ronald Reagan’s ambassador to the United Nations. In her speech at the 1984 Republican National Convention in Dallas, she explained her disaffection from her party: “They always blame America first.” In Helsinki, the president who bandies the phrase “America First” put himself first, as always, and America last, behind President Vladimir Putin’s regime.

Because the Democrats had just held their convention in San Francisco, Kirkpatrick branded the “blame America first” cohort as “San Francisco Democrats.” Thirty-four years on, how numerous are the “Helsinki Republicans”?

What, precisely, did President Trump say about the diametrically opposed statements by U.S. intelligence agencies (and the Senate Intelligence Committee) and by Putin concerning Russia and the 2016 U.S. elections? Precision is not part of Trump’s repertoire: He speaks English as though it is a second language that he learned from someone who learned English last week. So, it is usually difficult to sift meanings from Trump’s word salads. But in Helsinki he was, for him, crystal clear about feeling no allegiance to the intelligence institutions that work at his direction and under leaders he chose.

Speaking of Republicans incapable of blushing — those with the peculiar strength that comes from being incapable of embarrassment — consider Sen. Lindsey O. Graham (S.C.), who for years enjoyed derivative gravitas from his association with Sen. John McCain (Ariz.). Graham tweeted about Helsinki: “Missed opportunity by President Trump to firmly hold Russia accountable for 2016 meddling and deliver a strong warning regarding future elections.” A “missed opportunity” by a man who had not acknowledged the meddling?

Contrast Graham’s mush with this on Monday from McCain, still vinegary: “Today’s press conference in Helsinki was one of the most disgraceful performances by an American president in memory.” Or this from Arizona’s other senator, Jeff Flake (R): “I never thought I would see the day when our American president would stand on the stage with the Russian President and place blame on the United States for Russian aggression.” Blame America only.

Defense Secretary Jim Mattis, White House Chief of Staff John F. Kelly, Director of National Intelligence Daniel Coats and others might believe that they must stay in their positions lest there be no adult supervision of the Oval playpen. This is a serious worry, but so is this: Can those people do their jobs for someone who has neither respect nor loyalty for them?

Like the purloined letter in Edgar Allan Poe’s short story with that title, collusion with Russia is hiding in plain sight. We shall learn from special counsel Robert S. Mueller III’s investigation whether in 2016 there was collusion with Russia by members of the Trump campaign. The world, however, saw in Helsinki something more grave — ongoing collusion between Trump, now in power, and Russia. The collusion is in what Trump says (refusing to back the United States’ intelligence agencies) and in what evidently went unsaid (such as: You ought to stop disrupting Ukrainedowning civilian airlinersattempting to assassinate people abroad using poisons, and so on, and on).

Americans elected a president who — this is a safe surmise — knew that he had more to fear from making his tax returns public than from keeping them secret. The most innocent inference is that for decades he has depended on an American weakness, susceptibility to the tacky charisma of wealth, which would evaporate when his tax returns revealed that he has always lied about his wealth, too. A more ominous explanation might be that his redundantly demonstrated incompetence as a businessman tumbled him into unsavory financial dependencies on Russians. A still more sinister explanation might be that the Russians have something else, something worse, to keep him compliant.

The explanation is in doubt; what needs to be explained — his compliance — is not. Granted, Trump has a weak man’s banal fascination with strong men whose disdain for him is evidently unimaginable to him. And, yes, he only perfunctorily pretends to have priorities beyond personal aggrandizement. But just as astronomers inferred, from anomalies in the orbits of the planet Uranus, the existence of Neptune before actually seeing it, Mueller might infer, and then find, still-hidden sources of the behavior of this sad, embarrassing wreck of a man.