THE CONSERVATIVES LAUNCH THEIR ELECTION CAMPAIGN

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Well, this was the big day for them. An election that they called less than halfway through the fixed-term parliament. An election that they wanted. An election that they had to have because they were incapable of government…so much so that the prime minister said that they wouldn’t bring any new bills (including the budget) before parliament. They were effectively going on strike (on full pay, of course).

Here’s a brief overview of how the day has been going for them…

Thanks to Graham for this video.

Note to Tories: Try to keep Nigel Evans away from tv cameras.

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Brexit

So, then, the chairman of the Tory party, the somewhat inaptly named, James Cleverly, who one might expect to play a leading role in this campaign, particularly on launch day failed to turn up for an interview with Kay Burley.  Bad start.

But instead of making some sort of excuse, Kay, to her credit, empty chaired him and asked the questions anyway. Offcom is now looking at investigating this. Connections, anyone?

We’re indebted to Dr Galsworthy for posting this on Twitter. Enjoy.

Cleverly later suggested that he was unable to do Burley’s show because he was already on live Julia Hartley Brewer’s show when he was scheduled to appear. This is unlikely, given that JHB apparently started her interview by asking him about his empty chairing.

Note to Tories: Really, on the first day of the campaign, do try to get the junior staff to schedule interviews a little more carefully.

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Meanwhile, in our own country, the launch got off to a slightly unfortunate start (even more unfortunate than it starring Fluffy and Carrot), and I apologise in advance for the rude word. Look away now if you are likely to be offended.

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Note to Tories. Try to keep away from signposts or shop names that Munguin will giggle about.

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Graham’s blog is always a good read. Witty and informative.

Note to Tories: Isn’t there a load of dishes to wash or a pile of filing to do? Because it would probably be a better use of old Ben’s time.

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Welsh Secretary, Alun Cairns has resigned over claims that he knew about a former aid’s part in the sabotage of a rape trial.

The political satirist, Michael Deacon, suggests that… “Cairns resignation is a dead cat to distract from Cleverly’s empty-chairing which was a dead cat to distract from Cleverley’s interviews which was a dead cat to distract from Bridgen which was a dead cat to distract from Rees-Mogg which was a dead cat to distract from the Russia report which was a dead cat to distract from the Starmer video which was a dead cat to distract from Cairns which was a dead cat to distract from the blocked Labour costings which…blah, blah, blah…”

And that kinda sums up the Tory’s day. Still, Alun’s not standing down as a candidate.

The one big question is…how will Wales manage without him?

Note to Tories: If perchance Cairns is returned to Westminster, have a look around to see if there isn’t someone else who would do better in the Wales Office.

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Roll on tomorrow!

BAKER GETS ANOTHER ROASTING FROM NEIL

Initially, you may remember, I was up for Jeremy Corbyn.

I was delighted when, not once but twice, he beat the right wing Blairites into oblivion. What a delight to see the smug self-satisfied right wing of the Labour Party (Tory-Lite) eating crow, as they found their dreams of self-aggrandisement and importance disappearing faster than the proverbial sna’ aff a dyke, to be replaced on the front bench by the slightly scruffy beardy leftie backbencher, who claimed next to nothing in expenses. How cheers too, to see the unlovely Cameron make a real fool of himself when he mocked the man because he hadn’t spent £5000 on his suit.

Frankly, however, I think he has been a disappointment as a leader.

Fair enough, he has always been a Brexiteer and he hasn’t gone against his principles as far as I can see on that. But you can believe in Brexit without agreeing with everything the completely half-witted government in London is doing to drive the country off a cliff and bring back trouble to Northern Ireland.

He has no plan, no strategy for withdrawal that doesn’t mirror that of Fox or Gove.

In short, he’s not got a clue.

And talking about not having a clue, he really needs to stay away from Scotland, because he knows less than nothing about the country, its laws, its government and its people. Every time he comes here he makes a fool of himself and damages his party (like Dick wasn’t doing that well enough at that!).

A poor leader he may be, but now senior government figures (and the daft wee soul above), with nothing much to batter him down (as he agrees with so much of what they say, but is personable with it), have decided to accuse him of being a traitor; of committing treason.

I think you have to be VERY sure of yourself before you accuse a political leader of Treason. And it seems that people in the Defence and Security departments have done just that… not to mention the wee chubby bunny blokey, Bradley, who seems to suffer from foot in mouth disease and is clearly working on a book of “embarrassing tweets what I have sent“.

Not, I suppose in fairness, that anyone gives a damn what he thinks about anything in the whole world.

I not a fan of Andrew Neil either, but in fairness, he can, and does, hand incompetent ministers their posteriors on platters… or their arses on plates, for those of you who don’t come from Morningside or Kelvinside.

Steve Baker is a particularly poor specimen of a minister. In normal times he’d never get past bag carrier. But I guess that no one much wants to work in the Department for Exiting Europe, given that David Davis is an incompetent fool and that no one in their wildest dreams thinks that Brexit’s going to end well. So probably May was dredging the bottom of the barrel to find someone to fill the job.

But, he needs to learn that when you go on tv representing the government, you have to either stand behind your colleagues or …well, you need to resign.

As for Gavin Williamson. Why was he ever appointed Defence Secretary, and why is he still there?

TORIES, HUH? WHAT ARE THEY LIKE?

!!Ben-Bradley-MP

From the STV website.

The Conservative vice chairman for youth has apologised for comments suggesting that people on benefits should be sterilised.

MP Ben Bradley, 28, backtracked over a blog post describing jobseekers as “unemployed wasters” and saying that those who can’t afford children should undergo vasectomies.

“Sorry but how many children you have is a choice; if you can’t afford them, stop having them! Vasectomies are free,” he wrote in the personal blog in 2012.

“Families who have never worked a day in their lives having four or five kids and the rest of us having one or two means it’s not long before we’re drowning in a vast sea of unemployed wasters that we pay to keep!”

Mr Bradley, the Member of Parliament for Mansfield, deleted the post after it was highlighted by Buzzfeed News.

“I apologise for these posts,” he said.

“My time in politics has allowed me to mature and I now realise that this language is not appropriate.”

arutha

Mr Bradley was elected in 2017.

His offensive blog post was in 2013.

So, in my turn, I would like to ask, how on earth do the Tories vet their candidates?

Don’t they check up people’s blogs and social media to see if there is something lurking that could come back to bite them on the backside?

Worse still, this ‘person’ has just been made ‘vice chairman for youth’ of the Conservative Party (admittedly a job that shouldn’t tax his apparently limited intellect too much, given that there are only 70,000 members in the party and most of them are over 70).

Mrs May should be aware that he having been caught out he has admitted that he thinks that these remarks are “not appropriate”.

Maybe  “utterly repugnant” would be more appropriate. Who else does he believe shouldn’t be allowed to breed?

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After tonight’s vote in the Commons it’s clear that Scottish Tory MPs aren’t just failing to stand up for Scotland’s interest – they are actively working against it

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Big thank you to the Scottish Tory MPs who failed to stand up for Scotland today in Westminster.

£muddle

You’ve probably managed to persuade another tranche of people that, not only is there no point in Scotland taking part in UK referenda in the future, because we get what England votes for, but also that there is no point in having a Scottish Secretary, even if he makes reasonable tea, or indeed any Scottish Tory MPs. They vote the way the English Tories tell them regardless of how it hurts Scotland.

Not only are we not in Europe despite voting 62-38 for it, we shall also undoubtedly lose a raft of powers to the London parliament.

Why don’t you have the guts to do what you always wanted to and just shut Holyrood down?

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£lead

And, finally!

I’m proud to announce that Andrea Leadsome, loathsome fox hunter in chief, has blocked me on Twitter. I’m seriously proud because I must have done something to hack her off. I just wish I knew what, though, so I could do it over and over and over again.

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