JUST FOR A LAUGH

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1. I suppose if you are half cut all the time, no food and no petrol is a good look… but Nigel, what happens when you can’t get any alcohol?
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Frankie Boyle: I think there will be upsides to Brexit. I think it will be nice for the Irish to watch a British famine for a change.

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4. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha…idiot.
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20. Ummm except if you can drive a lorry. Oh and those who were already thrown out, if they have HGV experience, could you please come back for 3 months and then we’ll throw you out again (practice makes perfect). Oh and it’s it terrible that ex-pats in Spain are being ordered to leave by the end of the month if they have been refused permission to stay or couldn’t be bothered filling in the application (in British) because they are, well British.

Thanks to Brenda, Brendan, John, Marcia, and T.

Late arrivals:

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Um, first, um, see if we can get some petrol and gas… oh and some food would be nice too! Superpower, eh?
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32 thoughts on “JUST FOR A LAUGH”

  1. OK were at the end of the movie and the credits are going to roll soon. Since none of you have worked it out yet, still mesmerised by the BBC no doubt, I’ll link to this

    https://beforeitsnews.com/opinion-conservative/2021/09/biden-unveiled-pm-boris-johnson-whispers-youre-not-joe-biden-who-the-bloody-hell-are-you-must-video-3599961.html

    Previous JBs have been played by Jim Carey and James Woods.

    Be ready for a few black swan events, several well known landmarks are going down, such as Buck-Pal being destroyed -Yipee!

    Like

    1. Kangaroo, I wish I had never clicked on the link. I’m going to be bombarded by adverts, to boost and enhance my aura, frequency resonators for my well being, humic and fulvic (?) trace elements for, who knows, flushing bull shit away.

      Liked by 1 person

        1. May well be Derek, I don’t know what lancias is. I couldn’t get google to go past the plural of a Lancia car!
          I searched on fulvic, it is as I expected a natural organic acid, similar to humic acid. From my work I knew about humic acid but had never heard of fulvic. Incidentally the best source of humic acid is from the gut of earth worms, worm casts.
          I was taken by the narrow range of adverts on Kangaroo’s link. If it was a scratch and sniff page it would have the whiff of patchouli oil and incense. I take it the people behind these conspiracy pages monetise them with the adverts. After all they manage to gather together, in one place a small percentage of the population that would normally be scattered and hard to target.
          Suppose it is far easier to publish stuff and guff now. When I was growing up I can only recall dealing with Eric Von Daniken’s Chariots of the Gods.

          Liked by 2 people

  2. A few corkers there. Loved the piss one and the Thatcher one – tru dat.

    Anyhoo some funnies from @defiaye (the lovely Alison who owns Ragnar and Sherlock maine coon cats I once posted on SS) that are archery based.

    Why doesn’t the philosopher like to do archery?
    Because he Kant hit the Marx.

    To the people making fun of archery…
    …you cant nock it till you try.

    Did you hear that Orion lost at archery?
    He was given a constellation prize.

    Liked by 3 people

  3. Some corkers there, Tris! I really liked them all.

    However…

    I imagine that streets named after Prince Andrew are being quietly but urgently renamed even as we speak. But why has nothing been done about Savile Row? (I expect that’s where Prince Air Miles gets his commodious suits, actually, from some posh and time-hallowed sartorial establishment with “by royal appointment” somewhere in its letterhead.)

    They could call it Statutory Rape Street, to give our beloved Duke of York the benefit of the doubt.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. LOL. Imagine if you lived in a place named after Airmiles, Ed?

      I heard that the people of Inverness tried to get the title Earl Of Inverness taken away from him.

      He’s also a Baron of somewhere in Northern Ireland.

      No one seems to have a Welsh title except his big brother… and I think that the people of Wales don’t much care for that.

      Like

  4. great selection.
    Can you add today’s Telegraph one.

    Global Britain
    Stay at home, Save fuel, Save the government.

    This doesn’t apply in Northern Ireland.

    Thinking the flounder might be losing the plot.
    The home office is bringing back the maybot’s poison.
    Announced today that EU visitors will be tracked down and ejected if they don’t have permission to stay.
    The HGV drivers will be required to pay for a Temporary visa, pay National Insurance and tax, pay the NHS surcharge and get out of the UK on Xmas day on the very cheap transport provided by the government, Aye Right.
    Still think the tories have your best interests at heart with the suspension of the competition law on fuel prices?

    Like

    1. https://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2021/09/26/employers-pressure-let-staff-work-home-save-petrol/

      Two weeks ago they were telling people that they HAD to get back to work, in offices, not at home…

      Yeah, they are certainly doing a great job of encouraging people to come from abroad.

      Come NOW (it doesn’t matter where you are going to live), work all the hours until Dec 24 and then get out of the country or be arrested, having paid tax and NI and a NHS charge…

      Only two words to say to them and the second one is OFF.

      Liked by 1 person

  5. The comedy of the labour party conference.

    Jacqui ballie, msp, says that the SNP are trying to steal Slab’s vote in Scotland.

    Wonder what she’s taking?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Isn’t that what parties are supposed to do, otherwise we would all vote the same forever.

      Duh. Jackie was never overly bright, but I think she’s getting addled.

      Still her friend the Noble ffoulkes once said that we were introducing good policies… ON PURPOSE!!!! Argh

      In his case, of course, it may have to do with all the free drink they get in the house of the living dead.

      Like

  6. 19, the morning cat puking alarm, we have the real thing, it is very effective.
    The cat meows gently a couple of times in the morning then, if there is no response, starts head butting the door. If still no response then comes the unnatural sound that only a cat trying to throw up can make. A bit like a Frank Ifield yodel, when he’s being strangled. This brings a response. I suppose she is doing what has worked best for her. To order?

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Clever cat… Lazy bones won’t get up and open the door, eh? OK I’ll vomit. That always get the lazy sod up.

      Frank Ifield being strangled and yodelling?

      You’ve actually hear that?

      Like

      1. 😊 Vivid imagination Tris, no singers or yodelers were harmed in trying to mimic our cat throwing up or, the wee minx that she is, pretending to throw up.

        Liked by 1 person

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