BACK TO THE FUTURE…LET’S CELEBRATE

Image result for bongs big ben

Minting Brexit coins, demanding Brexit stamps, requiring that the bells of Westminster chime, when almost no one outside a square kilometre, sorry mile, can hear them, is the way that the Brexiteers are trying to take charge of what’s happening and make it look as if they speak for the UK and Gibraltar as a whole when, of course, they don’t.

Image result for brexit 50p pieces

There will be no celebration here at Munguin Towers and precious little in Scotland, where, by a substantial majority, we voted to remain.

I note that the Daily Express is full of indignation that the Remainers in the London Parliament have taken over and stopped the bonging of the bells. This despite the prime minister coming up with a solution that members of the public could raise the (roughly speaking) £500,000: 1s: 2d that it would cost. I’m not sure how much that is in “groats”.

Of course, given that the Tories have an 80 seat majority in that parliament and that every Tory swore to accept the result of the referendum along with the prime minister’s pledge to leave on January 31, 2020, that is a very highly unlikely scenario.

There simply aren’t enough ditches for this man.

Anyway, it’s all part of the great plan to make us believe that the UK has come together, just like Johnson-Cummings promised that it would and that all is well with the Rule Brittania’s Second Empire.

But, virtually nothing will change on January 31.

This is one of the problems that Johnson-Cummings will have to deal with on his “Liberation Day”. The UK may have technically left the EU, but all that will happen is that it will start a period of hard negotiations about a future relationship. As that won’t involve any of us, some may feel as if they have been excluded.

These negotiations will last 11 months until yet another 31st (remember October?). This time, December 2020.

 

Image result for brexit tenshilling note

At that point maybe Big Ben will be operational (although it seems that the work is taking longer and costing much much more than had been estimated …  “Quelle Surprise!”… ooops sorry, that should read in proper English, “well, I never, bugger me! Cor blimey me old mucker, stone the crows”).

The UK and Gibraltar will still be in a customs union. Everyone will still be able to travel freely through the EU. No borders will spring up. Brittania and Scotland will still be subject to EU rules and regulations, standards and courts.

Image result for really thick brexiteers

And Johnson-Cummings’s dimmer followers may get slightly restive about that.

“Why”, they will demand, “did I hear someone speaking Polish in the supermarket, or French on the train. We’ve left the EU, we’re supposed to have dumped them foreigners, ain’t we?”

So Johnson-Cummings needs to find ways of accentuating Britishness. Watch out for a plethora of union flags, displays of Morris Dancing, buildings being renamed after royals (except Harry) and the introduction of a national sport of criticising foreigners.

And you thought it was all over?

Image result for guys wearing funeral black armband

For those who regret the passing of our actual membership, Ed has kindly found a way of expressing how you are feeling. Very reasonable price too, so you can share your unhappiness with friends and family.

14 thoughts on “BACK TO THE FUTURE…LET’S CELEBRATE”

  1. I think after Brexit, as a tribute to their proud past, the British should resurrect proper old words like, prithee, forsooth and gadzooks. This will not only inject some national pride but will also assist in properly expressing themselves as they forge boldly ahead in their lonely brave new world. You know, for making trade deals and such.

    Me? I’ll be using lots of words that would be impolite to write here due to them being of the sweary variety.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Ah yes. Now that they won’t need in anyway to communicate with foreigners, the English should revert to language of Shakespeare’s era and the Scots to that of Burns.

      Like

  2. Y’know, I miss the old days when ‘Back To The Future’ was just a movie.

    I don’t think this:

    https://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/politics/trump-tariffs-uk-iran-nuclear-deal-france-germany-eu-a9286496.html

    has been posted very widely.

    The arrogance of Trump and the obsequious behaviour of BoJo is frankly, disgusting. As a relatively small island off the coast of Europe he has chosen the wrong side to be on.

    This will not end well for England.

    And, if we don’t escape, us too.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I feel worse than when the snp
    Wrongly swept to power at holyrood and Westminster (well not much power at westie more moaning a lot )

    The dictatorship of the minority
    In the UK 🇬🇧

    Still we will all come together
    And be one United Kingdom 🇬🇧

    Me granddaughter is doing a play about the Irish Famine
    I looked at her she says yeah very uplifting.

    Rule Britannia FFS

    Like

        1. Hi Trish. Me being pedantic as usual, but WE did not win the war. It was our parents and grandparents that won the war.
          Sadly there are too many of our generation that have pissed all the gains and accomplishments of that generation against the wall.

          Liked by 1 person

  4. I was reminded today of the comment from Robert Walpole on Britain lurching into the “war of Jenkins’s ear” – “they are wringing their bells – they will soon be wringing heir hands. ». I preferred the version from « 1066 And All That » but have forgotten the precise wording. Anyone help ? Can’t find my own copy.

    Liked by 1 person

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