RANDOM ROYAL THOUGHTS

As most of you will have gathered, neither Munguin nor I give a twopenny damn about royals and indeed some English bloke marrying an American woman is a yawn to us. Frankly, I don’t much care when a member of my family gets married, never mind one of their family? But it has headlined in the news so much over the last few days, and it must have been a godsend to the Maybot, whose circuitry must be close to blowing a proverbial gasket, that Munguin wanted me to mention it here.

So, just after Kensington Palace announced the betrothal, the Brit government announced quietly that most benefits wouldn’t be raised yet again this year. With inflation at 3% and expected to rise, that is an out and out scandal.

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It seems that Meghan is a Tory.

Meghan Markle‏Verified account @meghanmarkle

Quick lunch break and watched David Cameron’s parting speech. What a class act

Not really a class act if you have to live here as an ordinary person, Meghan (not like a duchess, as you will, obviously). He called an unnecessary referendum in an effort to save his backside from a possible rise in UKIP voters. He made a mess of tryying to renegotiate Britain’s relationship with the EU. He mishandled the referendum campaign and allowed people like Gove, Johnson and IDS, Patel and others to tell the most egregious lies about, amongst other things, NHS funding and immigration.

He refused to allow the civil service to do any preparatory work for the eventuality of a Leave vote, because, quite simply, he believed that people like him never lose anything, so that when Brexit hit us, the government was utterly unprepared.

Having promised that he would stick around and continue as prime minister if he lost, he announced early the very next day that he was standing down, but he would remain an MP. Then he quit as an MP.

He’s left the most unholy mess. Whether you are a remainer or a leaver, it is impossible not to see that the whole thing is being unbelievable badly managed by an incompetent prime minister and a set of nut job cabinet ministers at war with one another and who seem incapable of getting a single thing right.

Class act is not a description I recognise.

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Staying on the subject of Harry’s wedding, I read in the Telegraph that they are to be married in St George’s Chapel in Windsor. I also heard that Meghan is a divorcee. Colour me perplexed.

Edward VIII had to abdicate to marry his American divorcee.

Anne got round the Church of England’s ban on marriage of divorced people who have a spouse living, by coming to Scotland where the Church of Scotland has no such ban. Charles got round marrying Mrs Parker-Bowles while Mr Parker Bowles was still alive, by getting married in a registrants’ office (although he sneakily got the archbishop of Canterbury to bless the wedding, making a bit of a fool of the rules, after all, it is about the fact that marriage is till death do you part).

I was wondering when the Church of England changed their views on marrying divorcees. Anyone know?

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Another royal who suffered at the hands of the English Church and the seemingly sometimes flexible unwritten constitution was Michael. He wanted to marry Princess Pushy an Austrian noblewoman, but because she was a Catholic, he had to give up his place in the succession, because it was unthinkable that a Catholic could ever get anywhere near the throne.

I rather liked this picture of our Arlene meeting Captain Birdseye (alias Michael of Kent). I’m not quite sure what she’s doing, but it’s an embarrassing time to get caught short!

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Of course, the Daily Express couldn’t let the announcement pass without Diana popping into the office, presumably through a medium, and giving them her views on the thing.

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Anyway, as I would with any couple, I wish them the best. They will have it, of course. Many homes, paid for by us. First class transport, paid for by us. The best in clothes, paid for by us. Fabulous holidays, paid for by us. Servants, paid for by us. And presumably we’ll be paying for the blue blood transfusion as she becomes a duchess.

I was happy to hear that the royals have agreed to pay, out of their £60 billion fortune, some of the cost of the wedding. However, I suspect that the gigantic cost of security will be yet again borne by… you and me.

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