SOMETIMES YOU JUST HAVE TO LAUGH…

amaySo, the UK has a strong and stable government?

So strong and stable that it is being propped up by a party of religious fundamentalists that believe that the Earth was created 6,000 years ago.

So strong and stable that, in addition to the DUP’s help, they have now asked for Labour, the official opposition, to come to their rescue (and as far as I know she hasn’t even had the good grace to bung them a billion!) To be fair, Corbyn declined, but offered to give her a copy of the Labour manifesto!

I think we can now safely assume that Mrs May has run out of soundbites. Brexit means Brexit means…erm…red, white and blue catastrophe!

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Let’s be honest, politicians, certainly ambitious politicians, when they are on a winning streak, don’t want to share any of the glory with anyone else. So it’s unlikely that May is thinking: “Ah, yes, Brexit is working very nicely. It’s heading towards being a fabulous success, so let’s ask Jeremy if he wants to contribute anything to the process so he can take some of the credit when, in 18 months, we reach the sunny uplands of freedom from the EU and strike out on our own. Rule Britannia, God Save the Queen.”

And Mrs May is not the sort of person who takes kindly to suggestions from others. She has been offered suggestions on how to make Brexit work for Scotland, for example. And it took her a matter of minutes to reject anything put forward by Edinburgh.

But it may be that now she is beginning to see what some of the rest of us have seen for some time. Some of the issues laid out here, for example.

aland1

There just isn’t any way that this can end well…and frankly, that includes the idea of scrapping the whole thing and staying put. Can you imagine the outrage of the hard right wing? And here, I’m not talking about the hard right elite. Jacob Rees Mogg might tut and shake his head and use words like “floccinaucinihilipilification”, invented in Eton especially for his likes; Michael Gove and Liam Fox might explode (no bad thing); Nigel Farage would find again his raison d’être and stop sucking up to President (lol) Trump like a pathetic lost soul.

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But the real problem would be likely come from the average Daily Mail, Daily Express and Sun reader who wound justifiably feel let down after many years of reading about the paradise that was supposed to be coming their way.

Can you just imagine the reaction of those papers… and of their readership were that to be snatched away?

Oh and what about THIS lot?

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I think we can guess who’d be on the top of all those stolen pallets they’re for aburning tomorrow.

*****************

ahp-logo-uk

While we’re chortling, I noticed an article today about iconic British Brands beloved of Brexiteers. It’s quite interesting, but one thing that struck me immediately was that research shows that the brands most favoured by Brexiteers include HP Sauce. That archetypical English accompaniment to food…which is now made in the Netherlands.

So the Brexsaucers better hope we get a special exemption!

 

 

 

 

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82 thoughts on “SOMETIMES YOU JUST HAVE TO LAUGH…”

  1. Fantastic piece.

    Will she resign? Or be kicked out? I don’t think the Tories are ready to give up on Brexit yet so the next leader will just inherit all of today’s intractable problems. What happens then? That’s when Farage gets himself a gun and takes Westminster by force. I’d love to see the film but not so keen on the reality.

    Liked by 5 people

        1. Well she told us to leave the EU would be a disaster; then when the English voted to leave she said that that was what should happen, but she was adamant that we MUST stay in the single market and customs union, then when Mrs May indicated that we would not be doing that she sucked that up too.

          As long as Arlene doesn’t stop her marriage she is happy to go along with anything that her boss says. I don;t know what she’s an MSP.

          Liked by 3 people

    1. LOL. Thank you for the kind words.

      I wonder who would play May in a film of the story. I was wondering if it would be the womnan who plays, or played Mavis in Corrie…

      “I don’t rightly know, Michel (Barnier).”

      Liked by 2 people

      1. Gordon Kaye from Allo Allo as David Davis, Paul Shane from Hi de Hi as Boris Johnson, Mavis as T May. Any old foreign actor will do as Michel Barnier cos he won’t have any speaking lines. This will be a British film, after all.

        Liked by 3 people

      2. Terry, if that is Mavis in Coronation Street, my one claim to fame is the she was my neighbour in Lenzie; honestly. Thelma Barlow.

        Liked by 2 people

          1. She is in her 80s now and lives in Yorkshire. She was married to a Prof in Glasgow Uni and would drive down to Manchester on Mondays and back on Friday. When she turned it on, she had the most seductive female voice you could imagine. After their divorce she moved back down south.

            Liked by 1 person

  2. They have had the Scottish Government’s proposals for Brexit for nearly a year now. Remember that big book?
    What are the chances that it was never opened, neverming read through, before being filed in the bin?

    Liked by 3 people

    1. I think they know that the answer would be that Scotland voted to stay in and a special deal for Scotland is an absolute must. I don’t think they will countenance that.

      Liked by 3 people

  3. A seriously good read. That those who wanted not to be run from Brussels now are run from Belfast amuses me. And, you are right, ‘Sometimes you just have to laugh’…or maybe cry!

    Liked by 4 people

        1. I think it may come to that in the end. I can’t see any other possibility. They will come up with something and put it to the people. The chances are it will be a bad deal; the people will vote agaisnt it, and the Tories will fall apart.

          Ukip will rise again and we will start again the Daily Express et al, to vilify everything that comes out of Europe.

          It certainly wouldn’t surprise me if Europe didn’t really want the UK back.

          Liked by 1 person

  4. trispw,

    Just to echo Terry Entoure. “Fantastic piece”.

    Just to say I am getting more and more angry with Jeremy Corbyn as the days pass. It is pretty obvious that Brexit isn’t a bright idea. Even Jeremy must acknowledge that. It is pretty obvious that the Conservative Party have sold their souls to the devil. If these, and other, failures, not least having no other credible leader, aren’t enough, why is Jeremy not standing on every street corner screaming for another election?

    He would, probably win, if Scot Goes Pop’s polls are in the least bit accurate.

    I don’t think he would lose votes by coming out against BREXIT, which is probably the stupidest thing that the UK electorate has ever voted for. Indeed, I fear, he believes in Westminster too much.

    Frankly the place we are now in is a cluster****. And I mean that on a UK wide definition of cluster****.

    Liked by 5 people

    1. It seems to me that Jeremy got a massive boost from the young and educated who statistically are likely to be against Brexit and certainly against hard Brexit.

      I know he has long term been a Euro-sceptic, and of course he probably has enough in the way of principles to stop him changing his mind, but I’d have thought his anti-Brexit stance will lose him support.

      Thanks for your kind words too, Douglas.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. It is I who should be thanking you.

        The effort that you put into running this is remarkable and all to often, unacknowledged. I’d like to acknowledge it right now. If anyone agrees press the ‘Like’ button below this post. You would be supporting the site, not me. For we would not have met if it were not for this site.

        Sniff, sniff…..

        Liked by 5 people

  5. The Tories have been doing the equivalent of filibustering on Brexit for more than a year now.
    Talking the talk but afraid to do the walk.
    As a party,they are now completely hostage to a bunch of right wing nutters,the DUP in place of UKip,what a clever move that was.
    The Scottish government should allow the OO to parade through all the Tory constituencies on a very regular basis,just to let them see the reality of what they voted for and who is now making decisions on their behalf.

    Liked by 4 people

    1. LOL. That’s a brilliant idea. OO marches in the leafy suburbs; morons peeing in posh people’s gardens, banging their drums, behaving like escaped lunatics and singly unsavoury lyrics.

      What an asset they would be to the area.

      Liked by 2 people

      1. that’s a fecking terrible idea 😦 How could you do that to me! I know I introduced you to orangutans but there is no need to introduce me to the orange men. Is it not bad enough to have my first ever Tory MP after only two years of my first ever SNP one!

        Liked by 3 people

        1. Oooops.

          It wasn’t me… it was Munguin.

          I have to say I sympathise with you over the Tory. It mus be frightful to have an MP you just couldn’t go to. Hopefully you have an MSP you can approach, even about matters that are controlled in England.

          Like

  6. Before Rees-Mogg was born, his father wrote in the Sunday Times a piece titled “Letter to My Unborn Son”, in which, among other things, he suggested that it was probably better to have too little money than too much. Rees – Mogg jr probably thinks that pater’s advice referrred to benefit claimants.

    I would love to see the whole article again – would make an interesting item for some journalist. It certainly attracted some derision at the time.

    Liked by 3 people

      1. I might look for back files/microfiche of Sunday Times in Uni or National Library sometime – it is the only specific article I can remember from my reading of the Sunday Times in the 60’s – and the point about money the only point which has stuck in my mind all these years.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Correction – the article was titled “Letter to my Newborn Son” – Lord Rees-Moggs’s obituary in the Telegraph (available online) refers to it and to some of the reaction to the piece. “Newborn” would also make it easy to find the relevant issue of the Sunday Times if you know Jacob’s DOB.

        Like

  7. Well, this one made me laugh…

    Here’s Luke Graham, (Ochil and South Perthshire’s Tory MP) turning up at the chamber to contribute to a debate that only concerns England and Wales, talking nonsense, defaulting to being critical of the SNP , making a plonker of himself and then (gently) being told he’d made a plonker of himself by the deputy speaker.

    Priceless

    Liked by 3 people

  8. Personally I believe she is doing a reverse Major instead
    of resigning and challenging the bastards to put up or
    shut up.
    May is clinging on daring the the Torys to throw her out
    causing an election which they fear losing

    Liked by 3 people

    1. You could be on to something.

      I think they know they’ve made a bourach of Brexit, and want to palm it off to Labour, who then will make a hash of it too, as it’s an impossible position; thence Labour being booted out for 20 years, as the Tories guffaw and start all over again.

      If only Scotland had a way out, from the nightmare to come; eh?

      Liked by 3 people

      1. If only.

        At some point we could try to list the possibly outcomes of the Brexit debacle, but I fear our wildest imaginings wouldn’t come up with what really will happen.

        And they warned Scots about uncertainty?

        Sheesh!

        Liked by 1 person

    2. Yep.

      Of course it’s such a nightmarish mess that what comes next is anyone’s guess.

      Will they dump her before she makes them any more of a laughing stock around the world? Will they hang on because nobody wants to inherit the absolute certain failure in the next year?

      You can bet that what ever they decide it will be done with the interests of the party first.

      Liked by 1 person

  9. Tris, love the cartoon of Madder Theresa leading Bojo and the Orangemen over the edge of a cliff – if only! I don’t usually recommend anything on BBC’s website but folks might find the article about Norn Irn’s bonfire builders of interest. The link is:
    http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-northern-ireland-40567967
    These are the people who elect the DUP and keep Madder Theresa and the Tories in office. I think the article should have been called “BBC meets the BBB” (Bigoted Bonfire Builders). This is the “Sacred Union” we live in.

    Like

  10. Just back from an extended trip to Sweden, Denmark and Norway. All locals who have spoken to me are laughing at the UK and consider TM and her government a total joke.
    What I struggle with is how it works with Indy Scotland in the EU with rUK out. There is an awful lot of Scotland-rUK trade which is fine when both Scotland and rUK are in the EU. How will Scotland/rUK trade be facilitated when rUK is on the pish trade terms it will be offered by the EU after the EU has pushed the Little Englanders over the cliff edge whilst singing Rule Britannia and waving their butcher’s aprons?
    Incidentally, Germans I spoke with did not think Brexit would happen because TM and the Tories would be kicked out within the year and EU ref2 would reverse EUref1.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thanks, Clive for the insight. I suspected that the UK was a laughing stock.

      I too wonder if it will happen, and it may be the way that they suggested. The DUP may or may not (no pun intended) support the Tories. (We don’t really know what the agreement that got them over a billion quid was). The Tories may lose members (I note that they already lost some loud mouthed racist).

      Whether Corbyn would win or not; what he would do if he won@; how the people would vote if there were another referendum… it’s all up in the air.

      As for the trade between England and Scotland. Of course it is not nearly as much as the Tories/Labour like to suggest as anything that is exported through an English port or airport is counted as English export, even if it has come from Harris.

      But there is of course a good deal of trade in many different things… including many services.

      There is no doubt that like Ireland, we’d have to work hard to overcome these things.

      I am guessing, but I suspect eh EU would be understanding in these matters.

      Like

  11. The best outcome for Scotland is independence. I would prefer to be in the EU, but I absolutely prefer to be out the UK. I read lots of EU stories from multiple sources. This thing is a disaster. It will affect the middle class the most of all. We are going to get TTIP imposed as a “wonderful free trade deal” and we will be swamped with Chinese manufactured goods and US agricultural produce. Our own industry and agriculture cannot compete.

    It escapes me how xenophobia can overcome self interest.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. That’s true but the level of utter hatred of foreigners telling British people what to do is just astonishing.

      Id like Scotland to be in the EU. I want to go on being a European with all the rights that gives me but I’d be happy for Scotland to join Iceland, Norway Switzerland and Lichtenstein in the EEA, (although of course I know that deprives you of a seat at the board table.)

      The power of xenophobia is quite astonishing sometimes. It genuinely frightens me when I see some of those people seething with hatred the way that they do.

      Liked by 1 person

  12. I feel I have to join in with the praise and compliment you on that article Tris. You really have become rather good at the wry take on what is some pretty serious stuff.

    I particularly liked the bit about the sauce. Wasn’t he the most patriotic looking man you will ever see anywhere? Every square inch of him was oozing patrioticness.

    As for the pallet bonfires,(thanks for the link Andimac) was this an edict from King Billy. Maybe that’s why pallets were invented? If not then hasn’t it occurred to them that there are other equally combustible materials that could be used instead. This would prevent any pallet shortage and the obvious consequence of a pallet black market.

    It beggars belief that adults can act in this way and I just can’t imagine being in a prevailing culture where there has been so much strife that this is acceptable. It’s a very British tragedy. It reminds me of the Guy Fawkes night bonfires we used to build. We had to guard them too and we also tried to light other people’s before Nov 5th. There was also rivalry about who’s was the biggest. The difference was that we were kids, it wasn’t rooted in hatred. Our only motivation being, that it was the only time of year we got to build and light a bonfire without getting a cuff on the ear. The adults, where were they? They stood and watched to make sure we didn’t hurt ourselves or do anything stupid. The working class eh! Tsk, Tsk.

    Where are the adults in this?

    Liked by 2 people

    1. greig12, I liked the patriotic fellow with his bottle of cherished HP too. Looking at his huge red nose, I suspect that HP isn’t the only “sauce” he’s in the habit of glugging 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

    2. Well firstly, thank you for your kind words. Much appreciated. I’ll have to see if Munguin will give me a raise!!!

      OK, joking apart.

      They burn pallet and tyres. They build them big and put Irish flags on them.

      I wonder if the Irish built big bonfires and put union flags on them how would they feel.

      They are all ridiculous, but they now form part of the government of the UK. What on earth must people think of Britain?

      Incidentally, I thought it was illegal to burn tyres? Or is that only in Scotland?

      Like

  13. Tris, how uplifting to see the bit about Jacob Rees-Mogg, the arch-hypocrite And what a hypocrite! He describes himself as a practising Catholic yet defends the Tories’ shameful pact with the bigoted anti-catholic DUP. The man (I use the term loosely) is a bloody disgrace. He and his fecund spouse have six kids but he votes to penalise benefit recipients who are deemed to have an “extra” bedroom. By the way, his missus’ name was Helena de Chair – a bit of a misnomer, surely, as Helena de Bed would seem to be more appropriate. I really must look up my old Book of Saints to see who’s the patron saint of hypocrites.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. And there’s a real seachange in society. I admit to a raised eyebrow on hearing he was onto his sixth sprog. Once upon a time a large family was unremarkable. In some societies it is revered. In ours has it become frowned upon? Being Malthusian myself I think there are enough humans already. But 6 weans? 6 is way too many is it not?

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Wow. That came as a bit of a shock.

        But based on evidence of an academic study by UoM, it makes you think.

        It’s true that she was world famous, and people must have donated massive amounts.

        What happened to it?

        Like

    2. That’s strange in a way, Andi. You’d have thought, being so ultra English and traditional, that he would have been CofE to his boots.

      After all the Vatican is a foreign country!!!

      Like

  14. If I am right my memory tells me HP Sauce was originally a trade mark for Smedleys.
    Who way back were huge canners of soft fruit, vegetables and also jam and preserve makers.
    They owned huge tranches of land around Dundee. In the 1940 /1950’s.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. I’ve just consulted “The HP Sauce Cookbook”, which I happened to have at hand.

      It says that the Midland Vinegar Company acquired the recipe from an independent grocer in lieu of money he owed them. The grocer had chosen the name after being told a bottle of his concoction had been spotted in one of the restaurants in the Houses of Parliament.

      Wikipedia reveals the ususal depressing trail of mergers – “The brand was passed from the Midlands Vinegar Company to Smedley HP Foods Limited, acquired by a division of Imperial Tobacco, then sold to the French Groupe Danone SA in 1988 for £199 million. In June 2005, Heinz purchased the parent company, HP Foods, from Danone.”

      Liked by 1 person

      1. LOL. Soupdragon. HP sauce is actually rather good, and who wouldn’t have a cookbook to hand at all times?

        Than ks for your potted history.

        It seems to me from tv ads there that all food companies in France seem to be owned by …. mmmm Donone!

        Like

    2. Your memory is correct. Started out as Midlands Vinegar Company, then Smedleys, then Imperial Tobacco who, in conjunction with Hanson (remember that scum from the 80s?) asset stripped the business & flogged off what was left (not much).

      After that its been owned by the French (Danone) and the Yanks – Heinz, which is now Kraft-Heinz, majority owned by asset strippers Berkshire Hathaway & 3G Capital.

      tl;dr HP Sauce hasn’t been “English” for more than 3 decades 😀

      Liked by 2 people

    3. The Smedly name must still be owned by someone, because I see it form time to time on tins of peas. I think they had a cannery in Forfar once upon a time.

      Like

  15. In 1947 Smedleys employed 700 at their Kingsway Canning Plant Dundee, they also employed another 800 between Blaigowrie, Montrose and Cupar.

    Plus lots of us i.e. 1000’s at The Berries for the 7 weeks school holidays, at their farms on the outskirts of Dundee, Balgillo, (Broughty Ferry ), + others further afield, also at Carmichaels Farm (Longforgan by Dundee), where the old man Smedley had the Big House complete with Roller etc.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Goodness. I didn’t know any of that. Thank you so much for the information.

      I could swear I saw Smedley’s peas not so long ago. Maybe they sold the name.

      Like

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