Dear Jamie Greene MSP,

As a very important animal, and a media mogul, I would like to express agreement with you that it is difficult in the extreme to carry on business here in Scotland with such appalling coverage by telecoms companies. (Simply love the analogue and digital bit. Very smart and almost 21st century.)

Business set ups opportunities could be greatly improved by better electronic communications, of that there is no doubt.

The private companies responsible should be forced to get their act together, and surely the government has a role to play in that.

Your first three points (above) describe a disgrace in a modern European country.

Where I start to take issue is on the fourth point you make.

Of course, you could be said to be right, at least in a way. The SNP has no plans for a roll out of 5G in Scotland. Possibly the reason for this is that Telecoms is a reserved matter, and I suspect that your party would be the first to complain were the Scottish government to interfere in anything reserved to Westminster.

So, it’s true that after nine and a half years in government the SNP has done little to enhance our telecoms. But mainly that’s because they don’t have the authority or the funding to do so.

However, being an animal with excellent contacts in the higher echelons of Britnat society, I can tell you that the person to whom you should complain is the Secretary of State for Culture Media and Sport. Her name is the Rt Hon. Karen Bradey MP (nah, me neither, so I’ve enclosed a photo).

akarenThere’s little point in complaining to The Scotland Office. Fluffy’s absolute rubbish as you probably already know and his boss is some belted earl or somesuch other aristocrat (given the shortage of suitable elected candidates, you understand). I’ve put in a pic of Fluffs too, just because it never hurts to put people off their lunch. (Good for dieters.)


I, and my fellow Scots, would be grateful if you could use your undoubted influence as a fellow Tory (they don’t seem to listen to anyone else) to attract whatshername’s attention and get this situation solved.

Please be assured of my most respectful sentiments and my compliments of the season.


Munguin, Esq.

21 thoughts on “OWN GOAL?”

  1. The old throw enough sh**e, and some will stick tactic; not very cunning. The quality of the Tory bench warmers is something to behold, idiotic.

    Fluffy has lost some of his fluff, though his minds still rather wooly.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I think they got a lot of seats they didn’t expect to get, Jim. They had papered the seats with people rather less than top notch.

      🙂 Fluffy can’t really afford to lose much more. I mean he really wasn’t the sharpest knife to begin with.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Just when you get all warm and cozy with Labour being the party that keeps on giving up steps the Tory party and takes the lead in the Stupidity stakes … AGAIN! LOL

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Jackson with his trains jibe at Humza whilst doing a ‘Prince Andrew’ with his travel expenses; Murdo telling us that Scottish politicians are out of their depth in Brussels when very clearly Foxy , Boris and Davis, not to mention No-Mates May, are making such an all-fired mess of Brexit and Alex and Nicola are being well received, and now this witless dumpling. I see Stuart did the story too. So now everyone will know what a total loonie this bloke is.

      What’s next week’s complaint? how badly did the SNP prosecute the Iraq war that led to the rise of ISIS?


      1. Aparantly the next complaint coming out of Britnat central is that the S.N.P. are standing up for Scottish independence. I’m shocked! No seriously Tris … I am truly shocked. Why did no one inform us of this earth shattering news a long time ago? How on earth are we supposed to elect people to run our country if no one tells us the truth about who is standing up for Scottish independence! LOL

        Liked by 1 person

  3. Just in case you haven’t already seen this Tris.

    I am absolutely DISGUSTED!

    I am totally ASHAMED to live in a country called Britain. Note I did not call it Great Britain for a very good reason. There is absolutely NOTHING great about this anti immigrant xenophobic anti E.U. Troy run killing machine that is currently running Broken Britain!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. The daft thing is that we will shortly be desperately fighting to get people to come to the country and work to support our growing elderly population.

      No one seems to realise just how serious that situation is. I’m looking forward to how they explain the longer waiting times when all the foreign doctors are sent home.


      1. The best thing that could happen is for the “Home Office” to be accidentally blown up by say … erm … a gas leak perhaps! LOL


  4. Look at where the folks they are deporting come from. Mostly from countries WM wants to trade with post Brexit. Yup, that is a really good way to earn goodwill for future negotiations.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I’d have thought that the Scottish Government was more capable of administering this than Westminster.

    Perhaps this is another area where ‘The Famous Vow’ is more in the imagination of Gordon Brown than in any reality?

    Maybe it’s just me, but maybe we might be capable of determining who should be allowed to stay on our territory rather than some organisation based in London? Something that should also be devolved? I recall some Pakistani Pipe Band being prohibited from attending the World Pipe Band Championship in Glasgow for no given reason. This is in the same ludicrous corner of xenophobia.

    It is another clear distinction between a welcoming Scotland and Westminster.


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